I want a Banana Pillow

A month has passed and everything has gone a little hectic. Relatives have expanded; Parties have been had; Contacts have been reestablished; Environments have changed; Friendships have become deeper; Social networks have been registered.
I'll start at the beginning, shall I?



A week after Gencon, the sweet stink of social gaming still invading my senses, I decided to have another shower and hope that it might clear up for my cousins Wedding!
Luckily it did. I walked out as spiffy as a spring's morning and as suave as an English Spy. It was going to be a good night. My sister Rocked up and we Rolled. The Wedding was beautifully set in a little church on Latrobe Terrace. During the Ceremony, the priest made everyone take a pledge. It was a very respectful pledge.

"I will solemnly promise to eat and drink merrily, and be sociable to everyone I see, and have as much fun as possibe, on this amazing and beautiful day."

I made the promise and I had to keep it, else I ruined my cousins wedding! My hand was forced.
The photos were rather funny, actually. The plan was to have the family stand outside the church and a group family photo for each side of the family. Slowly everyone filtered out of the church and the photographer kept preparing herself to take the photo, but was interrupted by being informed that there were more still coming.

"Is that everyone?" the Cameralady asked in shock.
"Yes, I think it is," Nicole answered proudly.
"Wow..." She was impressed at the 30-ish people standing in front of her.

Afterwards my end of the family, who amounted to about 8 people including myself, took a drive into the city for a few drinks to pass the time until the reception.
With not being able to hear properly, because I become very near deaf around loud noises like pub speakers, I tried my best to play jokes with my uncle and aunties while downing the Sweet Strongbows so I can remove any apprehensions for later.
Time for the Reception came and we walked the distance to the Roma Street Parklands, where people were already socializing and enjoying the open ambiance of the Melange Restaurant.
The downside? Dust Storm. It wasn't a bad storm, but it was bad enough to eliminate sight to about 100m in the dark when you peered out into the night past the glass doors of the now closed off Restaurant.
Drinks were sloshed and the music pumped, the Medways danced up the front and disowned me as I pulled out the Running Man and some other move that crosses legs over and over... I was classy, and looks Spiffy while I was at it.
Following through with the pledge at the Ceremony, I spoke with some of Nicoles adopted family, people that she has met and placed as what could only be described as Family. I have long since forgotten their names (I have a memory for names like water through a sieve) but they were lovely people and I understand why Nicole has them around.
Seeing Nicole briefly brought a revelation that I would never have contemplated.

"This... is my aunty wendy... Did you know... That she's like... Like your second aunty now?"

Favourite quote of the night.
The party wound down and I departed with my sister home, only to see her the next night at Trents place for a very relaxing, and satisfying, Medway Family dinner.
Good times all round.

The next week was uneventful. I think I played Killzone 2 all day Saturday. Sunday was the Ritual of seeing Mum. We made the trek to the movies and found there was nothing available for us to actually go see. Very disappointing. Wandering around, mother put a watch on layby because she finally found one that she could read without having to put on her glasses.
There wasn't more to it than that. We went back to Mums place and watched movies and downloaded things onto my PS3.

Week 3 peered around and it was nearly time for my roommate Mccarthy, who is also named Matt, to move to Toowoomba. I was sick, and had spent the better part of the week in bed with a Cold and serial dehydration. At least, that is my opinion of what happened.
So we went down to the Little Tokyo Restaurant to celebrate his leaving. A little over a dozen people arrived and ordered, only to have half of them leave after waiting 45 minutes for dinner. The dinner was different and very satisfying.
Afterwards, we toddled off into down to start drinking, crossing the valley to get to a bar that I've forgotten the name on the other side to see Chelsea and Badger.
Badger isn't his real name. It's Matt.

On a side note, there are enough Matthews in the world that someone could declare genocide.

Mccarthy burst into laughter upon seeing Chelsea. This woman came to the valley in a floral dress made from someone's curtains, high leg stockings that stopped at the bottom of the dress skirt, hair that seemed to explode like dull red sparklers, and to top it off: A Paper Mache Budgie sitting in a hat which apparently cost $150, preventing her from coming to dinner.
It was the funniest thing Mccarthy had ever seen.
I ended up leaving a little early due to feeling a little more sick and took the train home. Along the way, I was texting Dee and made a mistake. I was preparing a fresh text and put in the wrong name. Panicking, I pushed the wrong button and it sent off to Danika. I didn't bother to apologise since she wasn't talking to me at the time.
Lo and behold, we texted for a little bit before I nodded off to sleep for the mornings festivities of Monsterpocalypse.

The Tuesday Mccarthy left, The Dick and Mel moved into Mccarthys room faster than a man after a Hot Curry. I was surprised. So the wednesday after, i spent my time moving my stuff into The Dick and Mel's old room. Now I like to say "I can spread out both arms and not touch the walls".
It's nice to have a new room. For about 2 weeks it was sorted into nice stacks of books, DVD's, gadgets and a mountain of random clothing. The PS3 and TV were mounted at the end of my bed and the computer was left alone until the room was eventually reorganised the other night.
Now everything is set up and I await the power boards to the computer, ps2, ps3, tv, logitec speakers, phone charger and psp charger to both explode.
I'm quite proud at how organised my room is. The only mess are the dirty clothes strewn across the floor.

The next party occurred at my house. As mentioned, I had been talking alot to Dee and she wanted to come round for a piss up. I said sure and we set it for Saturday night. I told Mel that Dee was coming over and she became excited and invited a few more people over, who were ultimately Euro Kim and Alex. I call her Euro Kim because she gets called American too much for even my liking. She has an odd accent.
Halfway through the week, I recieve a message: "Hey hun i can't make it this saturday because of a family thing, sorry."
I was devastated. I hadn't seen Dee in yonks and a piss up with her was going to be awesome! But nooo, family is more important apparently.
The day rolled around and Mel kept the plans to have the party anyway with just the Dick, Euro Kim and Alex and I having a bbq and drinking.
About 3 in the arvo, I get another SMS. I'm a textaholic, by the way.

"Hey what are you doing tonight?"
"Well your piss up is still on"
"Right. I'm coming over."

The night was entertaining. It segregated itself a little bit, going between the girls and the boys. The Dick and Alex were playing Need for Speed: Shift on my PS3 that I threw into the lounge room so they could have a game or two; the girls stayed downstairs around the table and barbeque to rabble on about whatever floated their boats at the time.

Side note: I learnt that saying ages ago, and I was appalled that when I was playing WoW one day and said it, someone felt the necessity to point out that it was an analogy about getting pussy juiced up. I didn't appreciate that and still don't. "Sex Fucks Things Up."

The night rounded off drunkenly and rolled into the hungover morning. The Ritual with Mum was on again! The movie of choice: Mao's Last Dancer.
It's hard to choose a word appropriate for it, but "Moving" is a good choice in my opinion.
I cried at the end. I admit it. I have no shame. Watch it and you'll probably understand, unless you're a heartless bastard who hasn't been paying attention because it's a "chick flick".
Mother and I revelled in the humble contemplation that the film left us in.
Dropping by the jewellery store, mother went to pay and pick up her watch and dropped off the shears that she has been meaning to get sharpened. Whenever I get my hair cleared off, the word "ow" is becoming more and more repeated, so it was about time that after 10 or so years she had them sharpened.
Recently I'd been of the desire to attain a pocket watch. Something cool to fiddle with, because I have a habit to fiddle with things. The only thing better than a pocket watch would be a ring that I would like to wear. I found both of these things at Chermside. The pocket watch at the jewellers, a plain silver pocket watch with a clean case and simple face. The ring in the aisle store not far from Target. Several rings there were to my preference, actually.
However, size was a problem. I have what my mother likes to call "Piano Fingers", long and slender fingers. Out of all the rings that I was keen on, none were of size P or Q (I have forgotten the exact size that I preferred. The only way to get a ring of my preference from there was to have it sent through with custom sizing.
With the ring exempted as an immediate choice, we toddled back to the Jewellery store and had a look at the pocket watch again. A 2-for-1 deal was available. Mother chooses two items from the same brand, and the cheaper of the two is free. After about fifteen minutes of picking out watches and my legs aching with hangover exhaustion, mother came out with a new watch and a pocket watch for myself.
However, the visit was short lived. I was very exhausted and Mum knew I wanted to sleep. The couch which I usually have a Nap on is far from comfortable, so I opted to go home and pass out. She agreed and I thanked her very much for the gift before shambling into the house and passing out on my bed.

We're up to the last week, where still nothing exciting happened except for: Last night.
I met Dee about this time last year. Actually, it was about a year and 3 weeks ago. I even said happy anniversary the other week (Awww).
We started talking and then things happened and we all but forgot about each other for a while until I invited her over to a party months ago.
We cracked it off again and have been texting on and off since, with my very random updates on life such as "My train smells like Mint Sauce" (True story).
She turns up last night at about 6:30 to present Mels new hair to me. Amazing work, I say. Dee is a great hairdresser. She had to go quickly because another client was waiting at the shop for her, which was fair enough. I sent her a message teasing that I didn't recieve any love (A cuddle, in my terms) and didn't think much more on it later.
I get a call at 8:30:

"Oh harro"
"OH harro"
"OH harRO"
"Oh HARRO!"
"Haha. I was coming back to the shop to pick something up, and I remembered that you whinged about not being loved. So I thought I'd stop by."

I wasn't going to stop her. I like vistors. It's residents I can't stand.
Turns out she's in a very awkward situation. Three guys are hopelessly in love with her! AND she has a boyfriend that she is hopelessly in love with! And none of those three guys are me!
Boy 1: She met him last year and hooked up while she was single. They had a thing going for a while, but she broke it off when she went back to Alex, the beau. Boy1 had his own girlfriend, who he is apparently still obsessed with. The thing he wants from Dee is pretty much 'Free access to the party'.
Boy 2: She met him last year and made out with him. He fancied her at the time and brought it up to her, but she knocked him back. Since then, they have been really good friends. At the party last week, he tried to make a move, but Dee said "No, I'm with Alex and I'm not going to do that." Since then he has apparently been Mopey about it.
Boy 3: She met him through Boy2 and didn't find any attraction in him. They were good mates since. Saturday night, she made mention about hanging out with some of her girl friends and he took it the wrong way, sending her lewd text messages about "joining in on the fun". Repeatedly mentioning that it's becoming inappropriate isn't doing anything.
In the end, because of the piss up at my place, all this bullshit has put her in an awkward situation because they're all good mates to her but they're giving her all the wrong attention. The Attention she wants is from the Beau, and he doesn't seem to give a damn.

"Boys are stupid!" she declared as she curled up with my sad excuse for a pillow.
"Girls are stupid too!"
"No we're not!"
"Yes they are when they hang around with a stupid hope that some bastard will come back to her."
"... Oh yeah, I did that once..."

So that has been my five weeks of absence, in 2,446 words.

Earthworm Jim might be in Trouble

Mollok Berserker Spd 5 Def 2 Brawl 2*1 Rage Riled Berserk (Red) Jump

Groundbreaker Spd 6 Def 2 Brawl 2 Pathfinder (Red) Flank Burrow

These are two units mentioned in the latest Monsterinsider Blog. It seems that Monsterpocalypse NOW! is going for a All-in-brawl theme for the Uprising. Cool, I say. First thing is first: Use my Oil Refinery. These guys have pretty good Speed stats, so why not kick it up a notch and get them to run faster and reach my nefarious opponents quicker. Maybe even get some taskmasters in on the action. They may not be as maneuverable as the rest of the faction, but Motivator and a good Brawl stat with Fling aren't something to be shunned entirely.

So lets have a look at the Mollok Berserker. First thing that comes to mind is "Power Producer". He gets hit, you gain a Power Die. He hits, you gain two Power Die. He's also a great support for Mollok Squads with his Red Berserk ability. His Brawl stat gives him a good chance of hitting Def 3. Another Berserker in a combined attack increases chances to hitting Def 5 fairly soundly. And the same time, you gain a Power Dice.
The downside? A poor Defence stat. So the Berserker won't be inclined to secure buildings in the middle of the field unless they stand for sacrificial reasons. If a group of Berserkers were lined across the middle of blockwars, it's a win-win situation. If they stay, you're securing buildings and have brawlers available for an assault where you gain Power Dice. If they are destroyed you gain Power Dice for each of them.

So that's a simple run down of the Mollok Berserker. Lets move on to the Groundbreaker.
This Massive Mole has nothing to do with short denim skirts, dodgy pink boob tubes, and a voice that can rot plants with the amount of cussing that appears in each sentence, or even for the darkening lump that turns up on the end of witches noses, but actually has more to do with the adorable little animals that dig underground with their massive and sharp claws to chow down on invertibrates, like worms.
At least, that's what the figure looks like. The fellow shows some rather average stats. A good speed with Burrow gives him the manueverability that Mole People should have, although it doesn't entirely make sense to poke his nose out of the water and say he's fine when he's obviously not wearing any Floaties.
That's unsafe, you know.
But with his maneuverability comes an Action:

Pathfinder—Roll the A-Die used to pay for this action. If you roll 1 or more strikes, crush 1 enemy unit within 2 spaces of this figure. Do not gain a P-Die for crushing it. If you crush a unit with this ability, advance this figure up to 2 spaces even if it has advanced this turn.

The Smarmy bugger dives under the poor sod and sinks him before popping up somewhere else! It's an entertaining thought.
But here's a twist: It is Red. It can be applied to your Fiendish Monster. So a monster steps over at the aggrivating little Carnidon (it's always a Carnidon) and crushes him underfoot before moving on.
Granted, crushing a Carnidon doesn't serve much aside from making a mess on the underside your feet, but it's the notion that the monster is crushing something that is important.
Returning back to the subject at hand, this gives the Groundbreaker more maneuverabilty for when he makes his brawl attack, an attack that isn't particularly exceptional. When paired up, they can take advantage of Flank on their individual attacks, but still lack a little bit of UMPH when fielded with a Berserker and a Groundbreaker Elite (if there is one, I haven't seen any mention yet and I won't be sure until tonight).
So in conclusion, the Groundbreaker is a maneuverable support unit, giving a lowered Defence for all Brawlers. But I'm thinking I prefer a Cthulubite...

Ménage à huit

Robin: Holy positional multitude, Batman! Eight people on a gigantic plastic mat?
Batman: Sounds like a recipe for Innuendo, if you ask me!
Robin: Sounds like a good time to me!

The Gencon Indy Monster Mash presented an 8 player field. The photos of it look awesome!
I counted about 34 spaces wide, but I lost count of the length at about 40 spaces.
The field was littered with what wouldn't surprise me to be over 150 buildings over 200 buildings.
Overall the design of the map was made to impersonate New York, the city of the Statue of Liberty, which naturally had that structure placed in the very centre of the field in the midst of a river.

---

But enough of things that are far from my own availability
This weekend coming is the weekend of "ALL YOU CAN EAT!".
I'm quite excited in case you couldn't tell.
Everyone will be running around throughout the day with their forces, trading forces and monsters here and there, and possibly bringing in some fresh faces.
It'll be very good.

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Last night, Scotty and I met a new player. His name is Kevin. He's a nice fellow and keen to play, asking lots of questions about the game and the locals and what monsters are being used. I was honest and told him that our gaming group is fairly even with hardly any 'power-gamers', which is true. We all play what we like, or whatever has come out at the time in my case, and we're very lenient on everyone's style of play.
We had a game and he pulled out his Martians, with Phobos-7 leading the fray, and I pulled out Mogroth (I wanted to go really easy on the fellow) to give him a explanation of the rules and how the game goes. The poor fellow was having some bad dice rolls, however. Three of four turns, he was unable to get a successful Power-up roll,

On the same night, I found out that Monpoc NOW! will be coming out this Friday (9th) and our local store has the Mega King Kondo's available! The deal is that you buy a case of each and you get a Mega King Kondo!
Huzzah!
So soon there will be unit and monster reviews-slash-mockups here for the Subterran Uprising.
In related news, we figured out what the Morpher is for the "Empire of the Apes" in series 6.

Four Monkeys, brought together by a strong truce with the empire, they bring fear and disruption to the world.

They are... a Barrel of Monkeys.