08 December 2016

The game broke its own Knees

"Introducing your new best friend, the Kneecapper Classic!"
Tell me something. Whats your best weapon in Fallout 4? Take your time.

Oh, Overseers Guardian? Yeah, thats pretty good. Two shots for one, thats double damage every time. Great for sniping until you can get Old Reliable.

Splattercannon? It goes alright. Keep your aim good and youll be copping it sweet as your damage overloads the big bastard's health bar.

Big Boy? Fkn oath thats good. Just the other day I was joking about using that to clear out some bumpkin blokes yard, using the MIRV Mod for added effect.

Well youre all wrong. The correct answer is my Legendary Kneecapper Pipe Rifle.

This little beauty unloads the drum barrel in... well if I said seconds, then I'm implying I spend less time reloading.

Every time I unleash this firehose of .38 Rounds, everyone kneels before me like I'm exposing a cock as heavy as gods own.

Seriously, 20% on every fucking shot might break the legs of whatever dried scrotum has a go at me? Its outrageous! It hits like a slightly moist napkin, but that's not the point here.

I've had ghouls in dresses, Raiders with Shishkebabs, Supermutants with Floorboards that still have the bathroom sink attached, and "I'm a big fucker with a fancy hat" Swan all have a crack at me and everything went A over T for them.

And here I am, a year later, level 102, and I am still rocking that sweet arsehole of a rifle and I will never look back.