Getting Down on Paper

Probably one of the more redeeming characters

Im having trouble getting down things I want to say, getting em down into a focused post, so I'm going to work with whats worked before: Big Fugoff Rant.

Where the fuck to start?  Borderlands 3 was a... reasonably good game.  It's got some big problems, the biggest of which is that it's taken the Loot Shooter aspect a little too far.  You get a gun, pick it up, and either sell it or use it if it's good enough.  That can be fun, but the levels are all pretty ordinary especially when they have added all this Parkour to it with Kicksliding, Mantling, and Power Slams.  I don't find they add much to combat, even with the artifacts that add to them, but the puzzles, THE PUZZLES!  There's some really basic environment stuff that focuses on those, a few climbing spots mostly, but after that it's just really underutilized in my opinion, so theres just a bunch of rather bland levels.

Otherwise there's the same problems everyone else has, the story is very safe and ordinary, and draws WAY too much from the previous games.  The DLC's are doing a good job in that, but the main story just whiffs significantly.

Then there's the big flops over the last 18 months.  I wanna talk about them, how Rage 2 had some good aspects to it but just really really really was a vapid game.  There was literally 8 main missions, and that was it.  After that you had to make your own fun.

Don't get me wrong, I love a supersuit story.  Crysis is one of my favourite series and to be running around a massive map with that sounds like a fucking fun game.  It was my hope for Crysis 3, in fact, but you'd be roaming about New York under a Dome and fulfilling whatever Psycho needed you to do.  It wasn't bad as it was, but I was a little let down by that.

Rage 2 however just seriously underdelivered.  If they make a Rage 3, I hope they either fix what they did wrong, or they just do something completely different.

Same goes with Fallout 76.  The game had potential, they have this massive intricate map with a veritable tonne of different landmarks and events, but it just didn't have any real impact on anything and hardly made it worth playing.

Then the marketting.  Holy shit what a scumjob that was.  Right now you can purchase a subscription which allows you to play it as a single player game, even though you already paid full price for the game, and you still have to be able to access it online.  If you're on console you need your online subscription on top of that which can double the price.  I was at least hoping I could just roam about by myself the other day, but I was shut down pretty quickly on that.

You'll notice that all these games were big Bethesda releases, and to add to that list of disappointment was Wolfenstein: Youngblood.  Yes, you can have a friend or random join you as you roam Nazi 80's Paris.  But if all you're doing is just fetch missions or destroy missions with little to no purpose behind it, you're just playing with yourself at that point.

The credit to those three games is that they are very cool looking.  They have gorgeous landscapes and art, a lot of real character behind them, and the potential to even be more characterful given the right writers and direction.

Two seconds before they became Red Mist (TM)

Doom Eternal was at least a really fun game.  It is fast paced, it is cathartic (my word of the month), and just really satisfying when you outsmart a bunch of demons that are scrambling around trying to kill you.  Sure, it's a little goofy looking with giant glowing powerups around and not fitting into the areas and makes it look like you're playing Spyro the Dragon, or Mario Bros, but it's still really fun to run and gun, especially around these really well crafted maps.  It's a game that Borderlands 3 could have taken a lot of note from.

The other thing I wanted to talk about is Warmachine.  I know I said I've not been wanting to play it, but that doesn't mean I don't want to have myself an awesome army to pick up and adjust when I want it.

And that army is definitely my classic 4th Assault Legion, last known as the Legs Eleven.  That army has significantly built out under its theme of "Armoured Corps".  I've got a gripe with having to play under themes now, but I'm foregoing it for the sake of this army.

It starts of with Kommandant Sorscha Kratikoff, a character that I previously didn't like for her assassin playstyle and considered too easy, but loved her character.  I still think her first form is still too easy, even with all her nerfs and such, but her Second and Third Incarnations are signficantly riskier and more fun for all parties.

Naturally, she has to take Beast-09 with her.  I love pairing Casters with their Personal Warjacks, and just about everyone has a pairing at this point.  Battle Mechanics, Bombardiers, Demo Corps, and Shocktroopers each have their own Command Attachments.  The Demo Corps have a character who romps around with a pair of hammers to lay the beatdown on whoever's in front of him.

The Solos have expanded out as well, accompanying the Drakhun and Kovnik are the Forge Seers, basically Greylords in Man-O-War Armour, and Tankers: Man-O-War the size of Warjacks.

Now, just because they're the same size as a Khadoran Warjack, doesn't mean they're quite as tough.  They have about a third of the health and almost as much armour, which they make up for with a pair of shields, but they still do a good job of playing Glass Fuggoff Cannons.

The Units are all paired up with Officers now, the Bombardier adding to an already fun unit, and the Shocktrooper giving them everything they every need and resemble: an encroaching Wall of Iron.  Almost completely immovable from their places.

The Demolition Corps, aka: Big Blokes with Fuggoff And Chill Hammers (tm), have their own Sergeant attachment in the form of Dragos Dragadovich.  If it wasn't awesome enough that they attack out of turn, he also romps around with two Fuggoff And Chill Hammers (tm) to bang about like a Salvation Army Drum.

Not just any cannon, a VULCAN Cannon

Then, the creme de la creme: The Battle Engines.  It sounds really awesome when you say Battle Engine, but then you feel differently about a bloke in power armour behind a mounted Cannon while his Chariot is being pulled by two Clydesdales plated to the rim.

It really is a fantastic army to even consider.  Add in a few mercenaries of similar stock, like an Ogrun Bokur or Steelhead Ironhead, maybe even Herne and Jonne to add more AOE's to the Bombardiers, and you're good as Gold.

That's the ideal list.  Just tankly upon tankly, themed out the wazoo, and a fun list to play all around.

Thats one of the things that I fell in love with when it came to Warmachine.  Blokes in pressure cookers beating down infantry with Halberds and stuff.  That's why I want to get part of it as my Gaming Tattoo.  I mocked up a Heraldry with a modified Shocktrooper Shield, Sorscha's Frostfang Hammer, and the Shocktroopers Annihilator Blade.  It's not a great image but at least if I give it to a proper artist I can give a few pointers and say "This is what I want", explain it more, and go on from there.

Couple that with the Sonic 3 and Knuckles logo, the Ghost in the Machine Logo, and Death riding a motorcycle (from the cover of Terry Pratchetts Soul Music) and you have my ideal gaming arm tattoo.

I've looked into a lot of tattoos, toying with the idea of "If I were to get this" and google comes back with a tonne of awesome results.  One time I just went on a binge of "What if I got a beer tattoo?" and after looking at a bunch of different beer tatts, I remembered that I don't like beer and prefer Cider, so I went searching for Cider tattoos.

I didn't realise how old the cider culture actually was.  I was originally thinking about getting the Magners Irish Cider logo on there but it was pretty ordinary, nothing like the Guinness stuff.  Then I found out about the German stuff and that was really cool, the traditional glasses and the Bembels that Germany uses, there is a lot of cool stuff.

I have an idea I want for other tattoos, but they're all ideas, nothing too serious.  Kinda like my want to get a Datsun and a Motorbike.  I toy with the ideas of getting a Motorcycle because it's cheap and cool, two things I can really enjoy.  But because Im a wuss and am already pretty convinced that I would end up A over T before I know it, I want to get one with a sidecar.  Then I could take my lady love for a drive.

A friend of mine pointed me to Ural, a Russian company that specialises in bikes with sidecars, and I kinda fell in love.  I love the style of bikes from the War time era, kinda bare bones and everything.  Ural kinda has that look with a few modern amenities, so if I were to get a brand new bike I would definitely be looking these guys up.

Imagine being this close and
not being able to justify it

The Datsun would be a passion project, an old car that I could learn to fix up and then take out for a cruise on weekends.  I figure it's a two-birds-one-stone idea, but with our living situation I don't have anywhere to keep it, let alone anyone to teach me.

To dream of having that one day though, to be cruising down the old highways of the US, enjoying the scenery, some awesome music playing as we stop at different places and try new foods or experiences... well that's the dream.

I got more inspiration from when we went to Florida.  I found I kinda inherited my dads ability to drive at night with little hassles in exhaustion.  Really, my only problem was my leg cramping up a bit, but that's more than likely from sitting in one place for 6+ hours at a time coupled with a bit of dehydration.

The inspiration is the Outrun theme.  In my mind I'm thinking Turbo Outrun, a game I played on the Sega Mega Drive where you drove from New York to Los Angeles, also known as The Cannonball Run.  But when I look it up in Ye Olde Searche Engine-e, I find out that it's a theme around neons and sunset/sunrises.

I began following the r/Outrun subreddit and since then gotten buckets of more inspiration.  Simple things, like gentle glowing interior outlines and console colours, and even a pair of pictures to put on the rear panels of the car mixing the Outrun Sun with the Datsun logo, then just making it a little cheesier by having the right hand side the Japanese Logo and styled like a sunrise, and the left hand side the English Logo styled with a sunset, and bob's your mothers brother you have something cool.

Again though, it's all dreams and Pixie Dust.  Maybe one day in the future, but in the mean time I'll keep that in my pocket in case the opportunity crops up again.

In Mother Russia, Bear Run Over YOU

Winter is coming

Sorscha Kratikoff, the Heart of Ice. She was the selling point for me getting into Warmachine, that amazing photo of her, Juggernaut and Destroyer standing together simply drew me in and never left me.

Did I was to play her though? No, I didn't. While I had a healthy respect for her, her ability was overwhelming and, quite frankly, easy.

Her feat combined with a spell that not only gave her a free move but improved her defence was too strong a combo to accept. I wanted the long game, to grind both our armies into nothing before gambling our lynchpins, usually ending with me failing spectacularly on bad dice rolls.

That didnt mean I disliked her. Her character was fierce, unrelenting, and remorseless. Her hammer, Frostfang, a symbol of the coming storm. Her mere presence still causes shivers down peoples spines.

It was too much power, Too easy to strike with, and I wanted little to do with it as possible, no matter the temptation.

Times change people. And so does Kommander Kratikoff, her next incarnation a polar deviation from her traditional style.

The Man-O-War steam powered armour, steel casing for khardic warriors too arrogant to fear being boiled alive, brings dread as the walking wall advances across the field; their annihilator blades cleaving enemies as they wash against their shield cannons; hammers striking warjacks into submission or destruction; grenades hailing down with their Destroyer companions.

She is the perfect soldier for the Man-O-War ranks, leading her comrades into battle with Khadors Winter at their side and their hearts.

XCOM as an RPG?

My friends all play Role Playing Games. And that's fun. IKRPG, Deathwatch, Shadowrun, and even the Classic Dungeons and Dragons. We've dabbled in them all. But I had a thought.

The Lads, my older friends, all enjoy going down to Agros enormous plot and spending the day for a yuppie shoot, firing rifles at cardboard cut outs of Zombies, stapled with packets of simulated gore. What if... Aliens turned up?

The GM would suddenly be hit by a giant gob of green plasma and instantly killed. The rest of the Lads would freak out, take cover, and encounter the little grey men.

Afterwards, the remaining lads would be picked up by a proper military mob and flown back to the Headquarters for interrogation. Of which, they will be recruited as a rapid response team for Xcom.

From there play it like new Xcom, where everyone has a class and earns abilities with each Rank and few digits and stats compared to classic, and cross it with Apocalypse with a Brisbane City Layout. They'll have a main base set somewhere near Central Brisbane, and they'll get UFO Contacts and Exalt Attacks as normal, but locations based around Brisbane.

Have a UFO crash into the City Hall in King George Square; Save your Operative from Exalt in UQ; Have a Chryssalid Hive wash up in Pinkenba before calling in an Airstrike. The possibilities are endless.

Every week would have a new encounter of some sort, and rather than having behind the scenes crap for Research and Spending, it would be a general consensus each week. And everyone would be conveniently healed at the end of the week, and an operative would be sent off at the end of the second or third week. Or better yet, someone who's missing for a couple of weeks is automatically an Operative, and first night he's back he has to be picked up "because exalt have found him as he's transmitting information back to base."

I wonder who would volunteer for MEC Trooper Augmentation...

+8d10 and he's knocked prone

One day this year I'm going to move to America.  I'll be living the dream of actually living with my partner, doing the dirty all the time between fun things.

But I'm going to want to continue playing games with my friends from Home.  And naturally that's going to be difficult.  I can't really fly over just to roll some dice every weekend.  I won't be earning that much money, and I won't be spending upwards of 30 hours of planeflight every week. I'm getting a headache just thinking about that.

We've been working on an online setup for a long time now, ever since Richard moved to Townsville actually, and it's just been us placing our laminated grid sheet down in front of a webcam and clarifying anything Richard has been unclear about.

It has been very hit and miss.  Either Richard drops out, or we drop out, or, as has happened, Scotts main computer will not detect that he has a USB Webcam attached and refuse to work.

And it's gotten worse with the new addition of Casey, one of Richard's workmates, whom Aaron has accepted with open arms.

Now we have to make two connections.  Any setup we had became immediately negated because it doesn't allow any of those shenanigans.  Three way conversations are for people with money.

So we began searching for alternatives.  Do we have a cheap and easy source for three way conversations?  Turned out we did, but that died in the arse enough times to finally move on to our eventual choice for Online D&D: Roll20.net.

It's still being worked on, so we excuse it on many accounts, but we still had software complications.  We logged in, we had a faff around, but we could hardly hear anyone.  The Audio/Video chat was terrible.

The website had prepared for that, and it uses the Google+ Hangout. Easy to implement so long as we all register with Google+.

It works. It works well. And we're doing well. Until I get capped.

Mum has a very good deal with Telstra. $10 for her 2gb allowance. The problem with that is how quickly it's chewed through. Mum won't change what she's got, which is fair enough. She'll lose the discount if she does change it, and i won't be here forever so she won't pay more for Excess Internet she won't be using.

Fair enough. So in the mean time if I am to keep connected to DnD, I have to find another computer. So who better than Scotty? He lives across the suburb, he's doing the same thing (at least when he's not playing The Old Republic), so easy peasy!

And now, since we've levelled up and improved our gear, I'm doing anywhere between 51 and 169 damage on a critical hit. And knocking them on their arse. Now to make Aaron threaten me. Cos I'm not worried about anything Aaron throws at me. Even slightly.

Laughing over Dice

Next week is Cancon.  And I'm sad I won't be going for a few reasons, mainly that I like some of the guys who rock up down there, and I have a few friends down there that I would have liked to have seen before I rock on to the 'Zoo, but it's mostly because of the games I had tonight.

It was a practice night for the Lads going down, and Greg was happy to play some games out on his back deck.  So we gathered together and began rolling dice.

I was playing with Humph, and while I usually somewhat dread it because Gorton Grundback is a Stunty Bastard, but I was surprised how well I played out!  I ended up crippling a Grundback Blaster, a Ghordson Driller, and destroying another Blaster and a Ghordson Basher!

I was very pleased with myself.  Sure, I lost my Behemoth next turn to my mistake of leaving him out in the open, and I stuffed up a charge thinking 14" was actually 11, but I ended up coming out pretty well.  May have gotten the chance to take out Durgen Madhammer if I hadn't lost on Scenario.

The game though brought back a good feeling of fun.  It's been a while since I've played Warmachine and tonight brought back memories of some of the other tournaments I've attended and how much fun I had.  And it made me wish I had planned well enough to actually make it to CanCon.

I've had a lot of good experiences when I went to tournaments.  Heck, made Best Sportsman before, which made me laugh.  But I always came out with new friends in them, or caught up with interstate friends.

I still remember a night when a fella from the Warmachine forums messaged me out of the blue.  I pretty much didn't know he existed until that point.  He said he was a Polish fella backpacking across Australia and thought it wouldn't be any harm to send me a message and ask for a bed for a night or two.  He got lucky.

So did I, in hindsight.  Letting a stranger stay in my house?  I shouldn't be so easy to convince.

When he arrived, I found him outside Central Station and gave him an option.  We can go straight back home, or we can go out for a game.  He took the game option, and I obliged.  They had some models there after all for us to play with, and it's great way to get to know each other by laughing over dice.

It's how I met a lot of my gaming friends.  And when I move to the US, I hope I'll meet people the same way.

Another exercise in literary spewing

Happy Birthday Scott 2011

I've been staring at this blank page for about 2 hours now and I originally planned to write about how I wanted to go to scotts birthday, well I'm going but what i wanted to do like get a keg of cider but couldn't find anything but one keg which disappoints me because even though Pear and Strawberry sounds like a good cider, it's the lack of options that disappoint me, and that's a big thing too because sometimes I just want to get just 5L of Bulmers Pear Cider because it's a nice cheap cider, and I like the pear flavour better though Kel says he doesn't like pear cider because it's too sweet, but I just find it easier to drink, but anyway, Scott's birthday is this weekend and it's going all weekend so with my other plans of going to Kel and Tash's to see Alex on friday and then my nephews birthday on saturday (it's a lunch/dinner at sizzler) I can work it all together very well so long as I can get back to my house before mum heads off to sizzler, then I can get back to Scotts to play Warmachine, or Dystopian Wars, or Talisman and all the various expansions scotty has for it which will be crazy fun though I reckon we'll have to make an effort to do something about getting to the top because it can be very easy to just circle around the centre and level up and then climb your way to the top, so we might try and get a relic from each end of the three corner expansions and then climb up the middle, whether it's the normal version or the alternate dragon options, but that's something to sort out when we get there, otherwise we can play our xbox's like Borderlands and maybe even Halo 4 though I think I'll have to share with scott because i don't have a copy of Halo 4 and naturally that makes things difficult, but we'll find other games to play I'm sure because there are plenty of games out there, heck we might even play Gears of War 3 and finally get me to that level 50 of Horde Mode, and hopefully take on a goddamn lambent berserker and have her chase me while I Torque Bow her to death and, well, that'll be fun all in it's entirety, and now I'm really starting to run out of things to talk about even with this mindless ramble that I have because it's all I've been thinking about except for my arcade cabinet which I really want to do but can't because without a job i haven't any money and also if I leave it here it'll probably just rot away because it'll be made of wood and the dust might even set fire inside the playstation 2 that I would have inside it and Mum wouldn't appreciate me burning the house down while i'm living with Jenny, so I have to put that on hold until I move back and get my own place with jenny, and having my own man cave with a sonic the hedgehog arcade machine in the corner.

The Dramatisation of Conflict

D&D has gotten a little... Stale, and our DM has gotten a bit burnt out.  So it's been a point of fact to discuss alternatives.  One alternative I suggested was a Theatre of War Campaign. We've all played the Iron Kingdoms Wargames and we all have our different factions.

But after thinking about it for a second, we came across a problem: Not all of us play Warmachine.  Some of us play Hordes, and the Theatres of War we have available are each designed for the two games.

I plowed on with the idea though, tackling the other big problem we have: the Theatres of War are designed for a previous iteration of Warmachine.  There are a few things different betwen the two systems, but nothing that can't be fine tuned over time.

But I've gotten my first draft of changes up, along with variant ideas, and posted them up on their own little blog.  If anyone wants to put their two cents in, throw it up in the comments.

http://dramaofconflict.blogspot.com.au/

Sixty-Two Damage

So.  We have a good idea what Colossals do.  And also some more stats and features of my favoured war machine of the Motherland, Conquest.

Lets start with his stat line.  As far as what has been spoiled, he has the same Speed and Armour as a Juggernaut coupled with the health of two Berserkers. (Do your maths, and yeah it's true)

Health is a somewhat funny subject.  When an attack damages a Colossal, first you have to determine your position to the Colossal.  If you're to it's left you deal damage to the left grid, and vice versa.  If you're standing in both, or you're in it's back arc, you can choose which grid.  Then when one grid is full, it goes over to the next grid starting on a d6, meaning you don't start straight from column 1.

If the damage doesn't have an origin, for example Fire Continuous Effect, then you randomise which grid it is (eg: 1-3 left colum, 4-6 right column) and then apply damage as normal.

Systems work the same as any other Warjack, but the Left and Right Systems apply to all the weapons on that side, Melee and Guns included.

Sidenote: Just realised that Critical Amputation from the Destroyer's Melee attack can get FANTASTIC Milage out of these guys.

As for damage, he can deal a pretty good amount.  Colossals start off with a Melee Range of 2".  Always.  I'm suspecting the only exception is the Kraken has up to 4" during his activation.  On top of that, each weapon has its own melee range which halves the front arc.

His fists are the same power as a Juggernaut with the Butchers Fury Spell.  Since he has two of them, it's madness.  Given his full compliment of focus, which is the same as any other Warjack, he can make a Behemoth feel a bit weak at the knees.  It's not often the Behemoth can stand next to a Warjack who can deal the same amount of Raw damage to a Juggernaut as he.

After that, there are new Power Attacks for this giant Warjack to perform to get the best benefit during his turn.  One is a Thresher Style attack, using one weapon and attacking everyone within melee range of it.  The other option is a swat style attack, where a model in melee range gets slammed.  No run up like anyone else would need, just backhand the target.  Which is easy with the Giant Fists he has.

But wait, THERE'S MORE!

He has guns.  You would think there's 3 guns, but you'd be wrong Right.  The underslung cannons are a duo with an interesting rule

We'll start with the Main Cannon, because that's a F-off cannon that starts off with +1 Range, AOE and Power over a Destroyer Bombard, with the additional benefit of Critical Devastation, Throwing[?] all models under the AOE away from Conquest.  That's a very awesome cannon.

[?] - I don't have the rules for the Mule on me, but I think it's a throw.

The underslung guns are a different story.  To start, as I understand it, they're just like Hand Cannons with the AOE of a Bombard, and a special ability called Creeping Barrage.  Rather than a normal ranged attack, place an AOE 3 within 12" and anything that enters/ends its movement in the AOE suffers a half Power Damage roll.

Board control?  Hell yes.  It may not be too threatening, since it's 7 off the dice against Winterguard or the like, but it still makes your opponent second guess his motives.

But if you didn't want to lay your templates, you can make an attack against someone.  Then do it again.  Because rather than one shot against a model, you get two.  Two entirely different attacks against the same target.  Whether you can redirect this second attack, or it automatically misses, I dunno.  But that's still awesome.

To top off his Board Control he doesn't suffer any forced movement, and can't be disrupted, both per standard Colossal Rules.  So once he's there, he won't be leaving until he's destroyed.

Overall, is this fella worth the same as a Behemoth and a Berserker?  I'll probably have a better idea if I put him on the table, but I'm pretty convinced so far that this fella will be super-fing-awesome.

Just for a little size comparison.

Skorne Ponderings

A few years back, I was playing Skorne for Hordes. They were pretty fun, with odd combos but I felt a significantly unnerving disadvantage towards the other factions, such as a lack of damage or just being unable to out-manoeuvre my opponent. They didn't have the same feel as Khador, and so I stepped out of playing Skorne and rolled back to the Old Faithful Motherland.

That was back in the MKI days. Things have changed since then, but I am well engrossed with my Khador stuff that I hesitate to consider going back to Skorne again. Or even to Farrow, whom I thought to myself as my new Hordes Faction since they played differently and possibly a little more to my own taste in play. That fell a little flat for other reasons.

Now one thing that has gotten me engrossed with Khador again is the variety of Warcasters. I'm mixing and matching all over the place. I haven't picked up Irusk in quite a few months simply because I'm playing other Warcasters, such as Harkevich, Zerkova and Strakhov. I've yet to pull out Epic Vladimir Tspesci as I haven't found him. (I know exactly where he COULD be)

So to this effect of playing different Warlocks rather than a single Warlock regularly, I'll pull out my Battlebox which I've still got hiding somewhere (I may even assemble and paint them too) and start playing some 15 Point games with them of a Sunday. Eventually I may pick up more Warlocks to play at the same points value, but I may save that for after i get my Colossal.

WARMACHINE: Colossals Preview

Holy Children of the Motherland, Batman. I want two. I keep saying I want two, but I can't really afford two. I'll be lucky to afford one.Lets give it an easy overview assuming it'll have the same base rules as battle Engines.

• No penalty or restrictions for being Engaged.
• No rerolls against friendly models while the target is engaged.
• You can always see it.
• Volume is 5" tall on a 120mm circular base
• Can't be pushed, pulled, slammed, or thrown. CAN be placed.
• Weapons allocated on L and R can only attack within their half of the front arc (90*), whereas weapons marked with "-" can fire in either.

As for New Rules

• Power Attacks!
  • Stomp: make an attack with one weapon against all models in 2" of that arc.
  • Swat: Target is slammed d6+2" away
• Works like a Warjacks,so can be allocated focus for additional attacks and boosts.
• Has TWO damage grids.
• Has a Weapons Platform-esque rule, where it can fire ranged weapons regardless of whether it's engaged or already made it's melee attacks

Now for speculations.

• It very obviously has Man-o-War kovniks for fists. So it'll be a P+S 20 weapon master. Probably more.
• The main turret shoots Devastators, so when they land it's POW 18 within 1" of the target and POW 9 within another 3 after that. So... AOE 8?
• The turrets can fire Manhunters or Doomreavers, depending on how harsh you're feeling.
• It can deploy Berserker Warjacks at will. Place within 1" of the base and let it roam free.
• Avalanches can be summoned and will simply remove your opponents models from the field.

You'll have to excuse me. I'm getting flustered.

Unit Upgrades?

Today's release on the Privateer Press loadout is a Unit Upgrade for the Ironfang Pikemen, the Black Dragons, containing a new Standard for the Bearer, alternate shields for them to use which replaces the Khadoran Anvil with a Dragon, and a new card with a few different rules, particularly a different Mini-feat, a new Tactics ability and a reason to keep the standard alive for as long as possible. (According to Battle College)

It makes me wonder about other "Upgrade kits" other factions units would get. Temple Flameguard, Bane Thralls and Stormblades are the first that come to mind, but I have no idea what the second would be. I would hope Man-O-War, but that's just because I'm willing to expand my Man-O-War army to ridiculous levels. I already have 30+ models. (Add another 7 when I pick up the Battle Mechaniks and UA, yes I'm going to count them)

De Offishul Damaskus Skarboyz Fan Klub

I have a Blood Bowl team, called the Damaskus Skarboyz. They're not a great team by any length, but there's always gotta be some sort of fan club. A group of fanatics that have their own Fantasy Blood Bowl team and have at least three players from their favourite team, and are always trying to get tickets to go to every game they can.

These are "De Offishul Skarboyz Fan Klub". They're Hooligans by trade, and they fight for stuff so that they can buy tickets to the Skarboyz Game.

Da Boss is a gentleman by the name of Skarbum. He swore dedication to the Skarboyz team when he saw, and slightly misread, the source of their teamname , and got his name changed by De Pol, which is a pole he carrys with him to smack anyone who calls him his old name.

His two Big 'uns are Docker and Packer, both used to work at their hometown Harbour until the Boss decided to play around with their orders making them move one lot of crates between five different spots on the Dock. Once the two caught on, they went off to have a piece of him, and saved the rest for lunch tomorrow.

Shparky is a Professional Wizard who went to the Guild of Professional Wizards. Shparky picked up his nickname after blowing himself into a wall from a fireball spell that fell short, and losing a few teeth that help pronounce the S sound in the process. Now any time he casts a spell that goes the way he wants it to, it's followed by a whistling Success.

Though Shparky is regularly hired for Blood Bowl games, the fee of 150,000 crowns is not given to him as he is not a Self Employed Contractor. He does not make any profit from being hired except for receiving free tickets for himself and the club, and free food which he spreads amongst the attendees. This caused competition within the club to go pick up the food, as everyone knew that whoever went to pick it up would only come back with half.

The four met up after the crowd came onto the field and went back to back with a few of the Team Members and, with a bit of rough business dealings, formed De Offishul Damaskus Skarboyz Fan Klub, a growing fan base that follows their favourite Blood Bowl team on a Squiggoth, who suffers from Myotonia Congenita and has warning signs of "Dun Skare da Skwiggoff or Yooz'll Regretz it" and "Keep Klear Fainting Skwiggoff" hanging from it.

Though they are quite a fan of Ork Band, they try not to listen to them while on the road. It scares the Squiggoth too much.

Mr Zurkon wishes you a Happy Kill Day, Scott and Gavin

Scotts Birthday Weekend just passed and it was exhausting. The entire premise of the weekend was for Scotts 25th, we'd go to his place and just play various games to suit the moods. Naturally, we hit some snags.

It all started Friday Night. I got home after work, had a shave because my beard was getting wild, a shower, and then made sure I had everything packed while I wait for Aaron to come pick me up so we could go to Scotts and we'd just stay the weekend.

So we hit our first snag. It got to about 8pm and Aaron hadn't turned up. Aaron expected to be at Scotts and prepared by 8pm, so we were getting worried. Turns out, Aaron was first on the scene to a Car accident at the end of his street. So he was held up and said he may not worry about coming around tonight.

Scotty organised with his parents to come pick me up, which was really nice of them to go a out of their way for me and Scotty. We packed up my stuff and off we went to his place to set up my stuff which included:

• Xbox 360
• Monitor
• Wargaming Miniatures, including Warmachine and Dystopian Wars
• Clothes
• A greenbag of Games and Gadgets
• Castle Ravenloft D&D Board Game

Soon as we got to Scotts place, we began assembling my Xbox Array to play. It started off really well, playing Gears of War 3 Horde Mode with Richard who joined us from Xbox Live in Townsville, and levelling up our skills. Richard and I hadn't played Horde 2.0 before, so the only thing we could do was build Caltrops. Scott got us to do that while he saved his money and got a Turret. We got to about Wave 15 before a wipe, I think.

That was when we traded players. Richard went off to bed, and Aaron arrived with Mcdonalds in hand. We talked for a little while about the car crash as he set up his Xbox and TV/Monitor so we could play Halo Multiplayer.

Snag 2. Just that afternoon, I had picked up a copy of Halo Anniversary so that I could play Halo Reach Multiplayer with everyone. I knew we would play it at least once during the weekend, because Halo is Scotts favourite game EVER, and Halo Anniversary Multiplayer is supposed to be compatible with Halo Reach Multiplayer, as they both use the same system. It's designed to be that way.

But that's not entirely the case. If you are playing Halo Anniversary and your friend has Halo Reach, you can only play multiplayer with each other if A: Your friend has the Anniversary Map Pack for Halo Reach, so that you can play on the limited list of Anniversary Maps, or B: The player with Anniversary BUYS Halo Reach. An option available is for download at a price of just under $100.

That's a big snag. We tried a couple of different things, such as Installing Halo Reach to the console, swapping games between consoles, etc etc etc, and we got nowhere.

The other problem we had was Xbox Live Logins. At any one time, between three consoles, two Xbox Live accounts were logged in, which caused no end of frustration. Eventually we gave up and left it for Gavin to figure out, since he's the one who basically set up the Network within Scotts house. Turns out it was actually a router problem and Gavin solved it. The only thing he was worried about was lag, which I think I was the only person to actually experience it.

So I moved over to Aaron's console and we would just do splitscreen. Three Xbox Live Accounts were logged in, but it was just 2 consoles so it got through without hassle... if it weren't for the Matchmaking. We sat there for about a half hour getting three other people, then one, then none, then five, then none. No idea what was happening, but we gave up to play Ratchet and Clank All 4 One. Scott was apprehensive only because he thought the game was Splitscreen. That is not the case, I told him. It's a single camera that players all interact on.

So Scotty unwrapped the unplayed game, as he had been waiting to play it with someone (i.e. Me) and slid the game in. We waited until it finished installing, preparing trophies, loading the game, and then had a wonderful hour or two of Ratchet (Scott), President Captain Copernicus Qwark (Me), and Doctor Nefarious (Aaron) running around throwing out wonderful lines such as

"Ammo. Stuff to kill stuff with." - Qwark

And

"The Doctor is in... AND HE HATES YOU" - Doctor Nefarious

Twas a hilarious time fighting for Bolts and trying to shoot each other across chasms, and eventually we retired to the mattresses left on the floor.

Come Saturday Morning, Aaron and I started off the day by driving down to his place and looking for his copy of Gears of War 3. It took us about 45-60 minutes each way between his place and Scotts, then we spent a half hour looking around the upstairs of his house searching for the game only to come downstairs and find it there.

When we got back, Scott Aaron and I began playing a Dystopian Wars game. Three way game, 1500 points each, Federated States of America (me) versus Prussian Empire (Aaron) versus Covenant of Antarctica (Scott). With the positioning, and our poor starting locations on a 6x4 ft table, Scott felt compelled to fight Aaron first. Aaron approached him very quickly as the closest target, sending off only a handful of things my way which took a bit longer to kill than they should.

I spread my forces out a little, having one Enterprise Dreadnought and the Independance Battleship head straight up the guts towards the middle of the Islands, firing off at whatever was in range. The other Enterprise Dreadnought came up around the other side to flank Scott. The proble with that plan is that they're very slow. 6" across a 6ft board takes time, even if I'm only aiming to get halfway across it, and there's only a handful of ways to increase it's speed.

So we started on Saturday Morning and ended Sunday afternoon. Scott came out best thanks to his really good rolls. The cheeky son of a bitch complained about my own rolls after seeing I had a really impressive attack roll against his Dreadnought, a critical hit. Which he turned around and rolled shields against it, and ended up negating the entire attack.

At the start of our final turn, I declared a forfeit. Scott had a rather badly beaten up Prometheus Dreadnought after what seemed like a lifetime of turns, much longer than I really wish it was since he was Squaring off against my Enterprise Dreadnought, and a Submerged (Not sunk) Battleship which had gotten in the way of the reversing Enterprise Dreadnought, who sunk after the collision and dealt 1 point of damage to the battleship leaving him on 1.

What I had remaining was a highly damaged dreadnought on the far side of the map (4/10 health left) and an untouched battleship. But with Scotts rolls, and the amount of dice that Scott was pulling out of his arse, I wasn't going to bother. I kinda wanted it to end. Aaron had already left with a bitter taste in his mouth after his Blucher Dreadnought killed 1 Frigate in the entire game. That's fair.

Back to Saturday, Gavin got the Router Fixed and we began our games of Halo Reach, six of us including Myself, Scott, Aaron, Gavin, Richard and Chase, until we eventually tired and moved back to Gears of War again. Because there were six of us and Horde 2.0 only allows 5 players, I stepped out because I was feeling a bit drained and my back was kiling me from leaning against my Warmachine/Hordes bag on top of the mattresses. It's not good back support.

Skipping back through to the next day, we finished off the Dystopian Wars game, and had afternoon tea which we elected as Red Rooster. Something different from Pizza or Mcdonalds. We won't be going to the Red Rooster at Strathpine again. They have the worst prepared Burgers and Rooster Rolls I have ever seen. I was lucky to get a Wrap.

Lastly, before we ended the night and Aaron dropped me off to pick up Caryl from the Airport, we played another hour of Ratchet and Clank.

That was my weekend at Scotts. Happy Birthday Scott and Gavin (They're 4 years apart, but born the same day).

Welcome to last week

Huh. Epic Vlad II, huh? That's a very Epic sort of picture.

See, I like Vlad. He has had a very cool life written out for him within the Warmachine Expansion books. He had a fkn ridiculous fight ahead of him last I saw in Legends, where he, Drago and a large contingent of the Ironfangs were trying to hold off the Llaelese resistance who were being assisted by the Protectorate.

But I've never liked the idea of playing Vlad, and that's because I keep hearing "Oh he's Sooo Good, you'd smear vegemite all over him and have him for breakfast."

Maybe not in those words, but you get the point.

So I steered away from him and kept with casters that I saw more appeal in, like Irusk and more recently Brian Blessed.

Though with the image above of E2 Vlad, I'm tempted to give the E1 Vlad model a go since I've never actually played him, so getting an idea of where he really stands as a Warcaster is something different for me to do.

I'm still yet to play Strakhov or Zerkova yet, since I've only just assembled them over the weekend, and I know I will play with them eventually, but this just adds to the list of Casters I want to play.

And if I wanted to do a theme list, it's really simple to get all the bonuses.

• Blood of Kings

Vladimir Tzepesci, the Dark Champion

- Berserker

- Drago

- War Dog

Great Bears of Gallowswood

Ironfang Pikemen (Max)

- Officer and Standard

Ironfang Uhlans (Min)

Kovnik Markov

Seriously, that's 35 Points at Tier 4. Kinda easy, really.

So now, lets talk about Vlad3. Lets extrapolate the man your man could Warcast like.

The most promenant thing that I've already made a joke about is that he's on a Horse. A Big Horse. I'm not sure if it's the same breed as the Man-O-War Drakhun's Horse, but it's still a biggun. It makes him the second Cavalry Warcaster in the game, the first being Jeremiah Kraye from Cygnar.

The second thing I notice is his weapons. His first incarnation had two Swords, a Longsword and a Shortsword, both family heirlooms which he has used for many battles. His second incarnation had these two weapons smithed together under the direction of Zevanna Agha, a guide of the motherland and to the Royal Family of Khador, turned the pair into a Greatsword.

Now he has a Flail and Spear. So I'm curious what story will lead to Vlad's new weapons.

After that... well that's all I really take from the image so far. I'm curious where it will lead!

COR, BLIMEY

HE'S FKN AWESOME

Infantry-machine

Regularly on a Sunday, I head down to an LGS and have a casual social day with some of the newer players. Yesterday was a very successful day and I had three games with three different people* and had some really fun matches, playing 3 games using Harkevich. I'm really getting into Harkevich. I think he's my second choice Warcaster in Khador, hands down.

* - Personal rule is that if there's multiple people at an event, play different people each game. Exception is only if there is a game that was far too quick. Eg: I was playing against Stryker one day, he cast Earthquake and drew line of sight to my Warcaster and killed him at the top of second turn.

So First game was against Aiden, AKA Callum. I say AKA because I have been calling him Callum for weeks now, months even. It hasn't bothered him, but it's still that bit embarrassing that I can't remember his name.

Anyway, he was playing the following 35pt list.

• Karchev the Terrible
• - Berserker
• - Berserker
• - Juggernaut
• - Devastator
• Battle Mechaniks (max)
• Man-O-War Shocktroopers

It's a nice little list that intimidates most players. But I was playing a hardy list that was able to take him on.

• Kommander Harkevich, the Iron Wolf
• - Black Ivan
• - Destroyer
• - Destroyer
• Great Bears of Gallowswood
• Graylord Ternion (AKA: The Gaylords that make everyone go POOF! **)
• Koldun Lord
• ** - You're welcome Kel.

It was going really quite well. He had everything he wanted going where he wanted them to go, and killing what he wanted them to kill. Unfortunately, he left Karchev a little too far open.

We had an open playing field, using the 40k Crater Terrain and some of the Ork-style Linear Obstacles. We agreed to the craters being cover while completely within the circles, and just rough terrain otherwise. That didn't quite slow him down very much, except for his Shocktroopers and Battle Mechaniks. Tow did pretty much the rest of the job. I just lobbed out Bombard Attacks left right and centre at Shocktroopers and Battle Mechaniks.

Sidenote: As I was searching for the Crater Templates, I found This rather adorable picture.

But when he had finally moved into charge range of my models, he had left Karchev a little open to attack. So I charged him with some Great Bears, two of whom barely reached him so the last charged the Shocktroopers nearby. They didn't kill him, but they did a good job tearing him up. Otherwise, I think I put a few dents into the rest of his army by popping my feat, firing off at Karchev before charging into whatever. I think Black Ivan charged into Karchev, but simply grazed the paint off with this Claw.

Aiden was panicking a little bit, though. He had ARM 23 Warjacks in his face, and had a large dent put into Karchev. So he tore apart Black Ivan using Sunder, his POW 19 Reach weapon, and I think he killed a Great Bear as well. Shocktroopers tried their best to take down a couple of Great Bears, but Tough rolls kept at least two alive.

Otherwise, he tried his Darndest to tie up my other Destroyers with his Warjacks. The Devastator tied up my White Destroyer, while the Red MK1 Destroyer was facing off a MK2 Juggernaut.

My turn was the final straw and I had a couple of options to kill Karchev. The First was with Great Bears. I worked out the maths, and figured they would put a dent into him, but wouldn't kill him unless I had some good rolls. The other option was the Red Destroyer. He was tied up with the Juggernaut, but that could be easily sorted out by making him stationary with Ice Cage. My unit of Graylords had just enough movement to get two into melee with the Juggernaut, and one standing back who would suffer a -4 to hit a model who is in Melee, but his chances to hit would increase with each Ice Cage, which lowers a models DEF Cumulatively.

So all I needed to hit with the first two attacks were 3+, on 2d6. So I jinxed myself and got Snake Eyes, an Automatic Miss. The other two hit, even the one with a penalty, but I lost hope for a moment. Then I realised the Koldun Lord has the same spell, so he unloaded onto the Juggernaut and made him Stationary.

That guaranteed Big Red's freedom to kill Karchev. But to see what luck I have, I got the Great Bears to make their attacks. Three attacks later, Karchev was Destroyed.

Aidens Moral of the story: Great Bears Rock.


I'll skip the second game, only because I have an interesting thought process to go with it, so that'll come after I tell tale of my Third game.


The third game was a long awaited game against Liam, Aidens older brother. He's just picked up Dr Arkadius and has been hankering a game with a multitude of Warhogs in his list. He also picked up Sturm 'n Drang as well. Since it was later in the day, and he'd been playing Arkadius all day, we had a go at Sturm 'n Drang at 35pts.

• Sturm 'n Drang
• - War Hog
• - War Hog
• - Graymeat (War Hog that I nickname so because he's like a Zombie)
• Bone Grinder (Min)
• Brigands (Max)
• Slaughterhousers

It was a hard fought match. I'm getting rather annoyed with Dig In in general because with fielding the same list as I did before, I can't guarantee something will be destroyed by stray AOE's unless I targetted something in particular.

Well I got a few lucky shots onto the bastards, and a couple shots into a close War Hog, while I approached his wall of Bacon. I wasn't sure which way the fight would go, whether his War Hogs would kick several shades of shit out of me (Which is likely) or he would crumble like a piece of paper.

Turns out I was the paper and he was the Scissors, but somehow my paper mache skills turned it all into a rock. Everyone was in the fray with each other, Graymeat was a handspan away from Harkevich himself, Great Bears in between after running as best they could to prepare to charge next, and then everything everywhere else. Each War hog had faced off against a Destroyer jack of any kind, maxing out their Fury stat to kill said Destroyers, leaving only Black Ivan on half health, and Graymeat was the only one who was left on only 1 fury.

So i thought about it for a moment. What could I do? The only way I could win is if I assassinated Sturm 'n Drang right then and there. I had to think. And think I did. I examined the positionings, my models abilities, his models stats, worked out the maths and the conclusion was: I had to play like I had a pair.

Graylords would use the magical shotguns to clear out some enemies. Particularly a Bone Grinder who was sitting nearby Sturm 'n Drang. Clear out one or two others and I would have a fairly clear line, and I get bonus points for being so awesome and clearing out his infantry except for about 2 models.

Unfortunately... I didn't succeed in killing that Bone Grinder. I did succeed in killing a single Slaughterhouser, after three Magical Spray Attacks. Disappointing, but it was only a bonus. The main thing was Harkevich. He would charge Graymeat and use his Beat-back ability to push Graymeat out of the way of the Greatbears. Why? Because then they can charge Sturm 'n Drang. So I kept all my focus, and used them all for Additional Attacks.

Beat Back: If this model successfully hits a target, the target is pushed 1" directly away from this model. This model may then advance 1".

Six out of seven attacks hit, and the last 1" move was to get out of the way for the Great Bears to Charge Sturm 'n Drang.

Now he had two fury for Transfers, which he planned because he was understandably a little paranoid something will happen. He hadn't seen how I'd murdered Karchev, but he didn't know what kind of luck he'll have. So I charged in with the great bears, and he took the first hit of 8 damage. The second hit was successful, but I rolled a pair of 1's and a two. Don't even think I dented his armour.

The third attack was a little funny. It was a good roll, but he said he was going to transfer to someone other than Graymeat, which I told him he couldn't because the other two War Hogs were on Full Fury, so he couldn't. So it went on to Graymeat, who was already well tenderized from Harkevich's Mechano-mace and a Great Bear the turn before. With a transfer, it killed Graymeat and left Sturm 'n Drang on 3 HP. With one last attack, the final blow was struck and I was surprised to find that Sturm 'n Drang don't have tough. And neither do Bone Grinders.

All in all, it was a fun game with a surprisingly bullshit assassination.


Lastly, we revert back a match to my game with Glenn. Now Glenn hasn't been playing for very long. I met him though Monsterpocalypse, and since that hasn't made a massive revival in recent times, he is slowly moving into Warmachine through a Retribution list using Lord Arcanist Ossyan. I was somewhat excited since I haven't really played against many Retribution Armies before.

The Slightly odd thing was that he didn't have any Warjacks. He was designing the list based on Ossyan's theme, so he had gotten a few of his Themed lists stuff, but the Warjacks he had ordered hadn't come through so he played with what he had at 25pts.

• Lord Arcanist Ossyan
• Houseguard Halberdiers (max)
• Houseguard Riflemen (Max)
• - Officer and Standard
• Houseguard Riflemen (Max)
• - Officer and Standard

I had to adjust my list appropriately, and it took me a little while to really figure out what I wanted. Though I was disappointed to find I'm one point short of having a Behemoth in the list, I made do and got myself comfortable.

• Kommander Harkevich
• - Black Ivan
• - Destroyer
• - Destroyer
• Koldun Lord

Just like the first game, we played amongst the Craters and walls, using Aiden as the Third Party Terrain Lord, and we adjusted the rules so that the Craters weren't rough terrain any more, but it was still required that you must be completely within to gain Cover.

It didn't come into much use, though. Two units of Riflemen with CRA are easily going to shoot a large chunk out of Harkevich. Which they did. Twice. And killled him.

It made me think of the days of Infantry-machine, where a Warjack heavy list would have a hard time against an Infantry list. Is that still true now? Not really. I'd taken out a large chunk of his Halberdiers with AOE's that actually hit, and some good dice rolls on my Blast Damage, but that was about it. I'm not sure why i was so focused on the Halberdiers when the Riflemen were the more dangerous of the lot, both with CRA +11. It's a pretty hard hit, especially with his rather good dice rolls, plus Ossyans feat which gives an addtional damage die on Ranged Damage Rolls.

But is Infantry-machine still promenant in Warmachine and Hordes? Hordes are obliged to put Warbeasts in, or else they won't have a spell pool. But there's nothing like that in Warmachine. Warjacks are an option, not a necessity, so you can go right on ahead and play with a bucketload of Winterguard if you want. Whether it'll be effective as a list, who knows.

I don't field armies without Warjacks simply because I like Warjacks. They're what brought me into the game. But I could field a Warjack-less army if I wanted. The question just remains is "Do I even want to try?"

Uniqueness

One of the cool things about Warmachine and Hordes is that there is a flavour to the game that takes the game to new Levels. You have unique units, and solos, and unique themes that some units follow by. Then on top of that, you can get Characters who may follow a theme, but have a uniqueness to themselves. Warjacks come in all different shapes and sizes. Few are to a particular theme, but as a general rule they are all unique.

Character Warjacks started off simply emphasizing a particular Warjack. Beast-09 is a character Juggernaut, for example. Drago is a character Berserker. Lately, the character Warjacks started getting more unique layouts. Black Ivan is a character Destroyer, however rather than the Executioner Axe, he has a special set of claws. Torch is a character Decimator, but replace the cannon with a flamethrower-mounted Open Fist with a spike.

The rules are all very cool and all, there is no denying how awesome it is to have a Warjack in melee with a Torch to catch a few guys up the back. Same thing with Black Ivan, it's awesome to have a Warjack that has a base Defence of 12. No seriously, it's awesome.

The models themselves are where I actually have a problem. Beast-09 and Drago received unique Models. Every feature about those models screams "I am who I am and you better remember that". They dominate the field leaving everyone feeling they have been struck by gods.

If you turn to the Warjacks next to them, Black Ivan and Torch... and you get two Basic Warjacks with some unique features. Replaced arms, bobs stuck on their shoulders, and a head to match. They don't have things hanging around their neck, or writing over their cowling. They don't even have the Khadoran Anvil over the engine

Business wise, I know that the expenses of making an entirely unique warjack would be phenomenal with having to create moulds which only last a certain number of times and cost an arm and a leg to make, and then no guarantee of sale makes it difficult. Whereas the plastic kits are cheaply made, and then smaller pieces are made of metal and slot on to the figures.

What does Black Ivan look like though? Does he look as plain as a normal Destroyer? Or does he actually have inscriptions across the bulk of his body that point from what regiment of the Khadoran army he was brought up from under the guidance of Harkevich?

What about Torch? Is he really a Juggernaut with a Buzzsaw and a Flamethrower? Or is he an Assault Kommando with armour tempered to withstand Fire and Acid, and able to throw smoke grenades to disrupt enemy attack?

It makes me wonder how different these impressive Warjacks would be if they were just a little more... Unique.

Campaigning for fun

Now a month or two ago, I said about how I was going to play Gears of War 3 with my friends, playing through the wonderful campaign as a Four-player Cooperative rather than running around by myself. It's a lot more fun, especially if we all start off at the same point, then we all experience the same thing, achieve the same goals, save the same damsels, etcetera etcetera etcetera.

When I got my new Xbox and downloaded my Gamer profile, I found that I'm missing achievements for certain games, like Halo 3 and Gears of War 2. I ran through Gears of War 2 again alone because I didn't think of inviting anyone. But it wasn't as fun as with a friend. Not to say it wasn't a fun game, it was still as awesome as I remember it the first time, but I know it's better when you have someone playing with you, whether it's through the internet or sitting next to you laughing their heads off as you decapitate a couple of people with a hydraulic powered crossbow.

So in preparation to playing through the Halo 3 Campaign, I've asked my friends to gauge who would be interested in playing the Halo 3 Campaign with me. I've asked Scott and his only apprehension is the control scheme being so different to the Halo Reach scheme. It's rather different, but I'm thinking of adjusting my own settings to use the Green Thumb control scheme for all Halos upward of Halo 3.

Other games that I want to play Coop are Ratchet and Clank: All 4 One. I want to get that game and play with Scotty. I know he's waiting for me, but it's just a matter of picking up the game so we can start. Also, Portal 2 has an update for it's Cooperative Campaign, so we're going to get in on that at some point when I mention it to Scotty.



Next year, when Borderlands 2 comes out, we're going to dive into that one as well through the Xbox. Scotty was planning on getting it for PC, however it was put down to general consensus that we would all play on the Xbox. Which brings me to the subject of Cross-Platform gaming, but that's another blogpost that I've drafted away and haven't bothered to type in since I started it.

I was thinking of making a Blog for our escapades through whatever games together, somewhere we could organise times to play and such, but that seems a bit much. Though we could apply it as well for our Wargaming as well, if we decided to use as such if we were doing a campaign amongst ourselves. That would actually be really cool if we were, but we're not.

Actually I thought about running the old campaigns for Warmachine amongst friends, but haven't sat down with a copy of Escalation or Apotheosis and worked it out for MKII Settings. I don't know if there are any very good conversions out there, or even if there's one released from PPress, but I'm going to give it a crack. I'm really wanting to go with "Point Cost / 2, Rounded up" to determine Victory Points.

So wondering about whether or not I should do the blog or not. It wouldn't be interesting, I think it would mostly have notices for what and when we're next playing, unless we do a battle report for each of our campaign games, but I dunno about that.

Now I've completely lost track of what I was talking about.

What's Black, White and Red all over? Two Destroyers and an Ivan

Every Sunday I head to Spring Hill to play games at the LGS there. At least I try to. Yesterday I made it there and had a couple of really enjoyable games with Kommander Brian Blessed. I mean, Kommander Izak Harkevich.

Now, I originally thought he was an awkward caster. He has a heap of spells that are really interesting, but he's just hard to really get off the ground. But this yesterday was different. They were significantly better than the last couple of games I had using him, where he'd be overloaded with Warjacks (I had a Behemoth and two destroyers I think) and I would hope for the best out of their ranged attacks.

This time, I got a fantastic result out of the two games i had with him. The first game was 50pts against Kara Sloan. I technically lost, but got a wonderful moral victory out of it.

The lists were as follows.

• Kommander Izak Harkevich
• - Black Ivan
• - White Destroyer
• - Red Destroyer
• - War Dog
• Great Bears of Gallowswood
• Greylord Ternion
• Widowmakers
• Winterguard Infantry (Max)
• - Officer and Standard
• - Rocketeer (1)
• Koldun Lord
• Kovnik Jozef Grigorivich

• Captain Kara Sloan (*6pts)
• - Cyclone (9pts)
• - Defender (9pts)
• - Stormclad (10pts)
• - Squire (2pts)
• Black 13th Gun Mage Strike Team (4pts)
• Storm Tower (2pts)
• Stormblade Infantry (Leader and 5 Grunts) (5pts)
• - Stormblade Infantry Officer & Standard (3pts)
• Sword Knights (Leader and 5 Grunts) (4pts)
• Trencher Infantry (Leader and 5 Grunts) (6pts)
• Captain Arlan Strangewayes (2pts)

He started off with a list of things he hadn't used, and some reliable fellas. I pulled out mostly reliable stuff, and designed Harkevich's battlegroup to include three warjacks. So Black Ivan, and two Destroyers. I love Destroyers and I only wish they were P+S 18 still, rather than 17.

One thing I was happy about was using the Koldun Lord. I've rarely used him, but he came into great use. My second turn, everyone was in range to shoot, so the Koldun Lord gave a point of Focus to Black Ivan to Boost Damage since Ivan's affinity offers automatically boosted attack rolls. Then the other two Destroyers would boost to hit using focus from Harkevich.

With Harkevich's four focus, he upkeeps Escort from last turn and put the remaining three to use for Broadsides. Out of the 6 AOEs thrown out there and and slightly beyond the Stormclad I caught a couple of Stormblades and one AOE caught Kara who she copped a boosted damage roll for either 4 or 7 damage.

Next turn, I got my chance to charge into his Stormclad and Cyclone. With the Escort up and his Feat popped, Black Ivan and Red Destroyer charged in and tore a good chunk off the buggers. Harkevich gave them two focus each as well, I think, and White Destroyer was left guarding Harkevich's Flank from a Defender that was creeping around.

Russ's turn was spent either missing half the attacks on Black Ivan, or slowly Grinding at the Red Destroyer. That +3 armour to my Khador Warjacks? Holy **** biscuits on a **** platter does it make a difference. I sat there and took so little damage. It helped that I crippled the Stormblade's Sword Arm, but CRIMENY.

Oh and it was rather funny when the Cyclone who couldn't shoot any more and hold up my Winterguard from Advancing, sat there and tried to double handed throw Black Ivan. Twice he tried this turn and the next, and with both Strength Test Rolls we equalled on the dice. Which means I win since I have 1 more Strength than he does. I had to laugh because the chances of rolling higher than 2d6 with only 1d6 is very improbable.

Fourth turn, the last before I was shot to oblivion, I surprised him with some Winterguard Fun. Grape Shot plus "For The Motherland" makes for an infantry killing turn. Which I did to his trenchers and the better part of his remaining Stormblades. I think there were two left, including the officer who had taken about 3 points of damage, one after the other, through the game.

The Greylords, who were mostly putting clouds on the Warjacks to defend Old Mate, had charged in last turn and one tried to kill a Trencher but failed to hit. One kept back to surprise them from the side, so the other two were basically sacrificed to hold up the trenchers. At the fourth turn, the remaining Greylord was suddenly surrounded by Running Sword Knights, and luckily three of them were in a line. So off he fired the Magical Shotgun and away went two Sword Knights, the last two taken out by Harkevich's Hand Cannon and White Destroyers Executioner Axe.

That was when Kara moved up and got a bead on Harkevich with her Rifle and the Defenders Cannon. Two shots, and he was down and out. As you'd expect from a Boosted Weapon Master POW 12 and a Boosted POW 15.

Before I forget though, the Great Bears of Gallowswood made up their points value, I reckon, by stopping the Black 13th from doing anything significant. Granted, he didn't lose a single model and I lost all three Great Bears, but you know what? If the Black 13th were more in the fray than taking the long way around the flank, it would have been a very different game. I probably would've lost more Winterguard much earlier in the game.

Russ conceded the moral victory to me for BUTCHERING his army and pulling off a "Bullshit Assassination". Which wasn't quite bullshit, it's the way I would expect a dirty Cygnaran player to Assassinate me.

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Second game was against Aiden's Karchev the Terrible. This was a massive grinding match, pitting Khador versus Khador. But it was really fun at the 35pt Level with the following lists.

• Kommander Harkevich, the Iron Wolf (*5pts)
• * Black Ivan (10pts)
• * Destroyer (9pts)
• * Destroyer (9pts)
• * War dog (1pts)
• Great Bears of Gallowswood (5pts)
• Greylord Ternion (Leader and 2 Grunts) (4pts)
• Koldun Lord (2pts)

• Karchev the Terrible (*5pts)
• * Berserker (6pts)
• * Berserker (6pts)
• * Decimator (9pts)
• * Juggernaut (7pts)
• Battle Mechaniks (Leader and 5 Grunts) (3pts)
• Man-o-war Shocktroopers (Leader and 4 Grunts) (9pts)

This game was fun, but could've worked out a bit better if he changed up one thing. We threw each others Warjacks against each other, and I mean threw them. Mine charged first during the feat turn and he had Towed most of his warjacks into the Fray. There was only one Warjack that missed out in getting into the fray which was one of his Berserkers. He fell a little way behind the rest of the Party.

The mistake that was made was that a poor Berserker had gotten ahead as well, and copped the better part of about 6 Bombard Attacks, and a Charging Black Ivan. He was quickly torn apart. Afterwards, Karchev got into the Grinding melee with his own Axe versus my Feated Warjacks.

The better option, which he agreed with, was to have Karchev move a little way out of melee and use the ranged attack to Knock down everything in front of his own Warjacks. Oh and to get his Berserker up the front a bit quicker, maybe taking the place of where Karchev was. That way, Karchev wouldn't have been punched into Oblivion by Black Ivan with Fortune cast on him.

One thing that was Frustrating? Black Ivan has Critical: Brutal Damage. Out of the 6-8 attacks I made against Karchev, do you think I made a SINGLE Critical hit? NO! Everything else in my army got Criticals Galore! But could Black Ivan do it? No, the spiteful bugger decided to extend Karchev's death.

---

So overall, I had a good weekend with some great games. I can't wait for next week!

Calamari Throne

Lately I've been really getting into my Nerdistry and working on my models. Inso much as to have mostly assembled my Behemoth, mostly re-assembled my Karchev, and begun painting my Blood Bowl team.

I even went out to get some spray paint and basing sand so that I could undercoat them. $41 later from a Games Workshop, I had these two items. Never again. $26 for a can of spray paint? I may as well go to Supercheap Auto. It's the wrong kind of spray paint, but damnit it'll be cheaper, surely. And $15 for 100g of sand? Yeah, I'm going to make these last a bloody long time, and next time I'm going to the beach.

Still, I've gotten into my models and started cleaning off flash and supergluing my fingers together in hopes to put the rest of them together. Luckily, I did! The downside? My Khador Behemoth looks goofy. He's in the proper stance that's advertised on the box, with one leg up... but I don't like that pose.

So I'm going to look for a Rock which will fit underneath the Behemoths foot. I could chase after some greenstuff, but a rock will add that little bit of stability this monstrous pewter figure will need. Probably should've thought about that when I first bought him a year ago.

Which reminds me, I do have to email PP-Frontdesk about a missing Bombard Cannon.

Alongside him is Karchev, the Terrible. Now I tried putting his legs together a long time ago, and eventually wrecked them to a poin that I just got a pair of new legs on order and now I'm using those which have glued together VERy nicely.

Then I had a look at a Plastic Battlebox that I picked up ages ago. I picked it up last year thinking "Yeah, I'll get two more Warjack kits out of it and have a Sorscha to have battlebox games with." When I opened it, I was under the presumption that I'd used one of the Warjack Kits, but I was lucky enough to have two. So I assembled a Marauder, and half assembled the Soon-To-Be Black Ivan which I have waiting for me.

I'm also going to go for a different paint scheme for my Khador. Black Ivan will be the same, and I think I'll paint Torch in the same Scheme, but the others I'm going to try and go for something like this:

Oh look, that's a MERCS Behemoth. You know what would look very similar if it got a rock under it's foot? The Khador Behemoth.

Funny that.

After all these guys, I'm going to paint up my FSA Dystopian Wars Fleet. I've got my battleboxes on hand, and my Dreadnought, Escorts and Destroyers are over at Kelvins since I slept in way too late to dash over there myself to pick them up on Saturday (damn you sleepy times and your voracious ways) so I asked him for the biggest favour of picking them up for me. Owe him a drink, that's for sure.

On Wednesday last week, I received an email asking if I wanted to have a game on Saturday. Liam, a guy I demo'd in January, was going to bring his brother and a few of his mates along. His brother knows how to play, but his mates don't and they wanted to have a demo game to learn.

Legion and Menoth? Easy done. I can borrow from Scotty and I have my own (Unpainted) Menoth Battlebox. Along with that, I have a Khador Battlebox (Naturally), a Cygnar Battlebox, a Cryx Battlebox which I bought for $20 second hand from Fastbreak, and a Trollblood Battlebox. And if I do some digging and Assembling, I can pull out a Skorne Battlebox. And I'm not sure if a Farrow Battlebox is sanctioned, but that's what I'm going to use anyway.

I really should get some generic tokens though.

Actually, that's something that kinda Irks me. Hordes Battleboxes are, as a general rule, 1 Large Warbeast, 2 of the same Light Warbeast. The Legion box is the exception because it has 4 of the same lesser warbeasts. Whereas Warmachine has 1 Large Warjack, then 2 different Light Warjacks, Khador with 2 different heavy Warjacks and Cryx have 1 Heavy and 3 lights, but 1 different from the other.

The point is that Warmachine has that little bit of diversity. More options. So while I have the official battleboxes for Hordes, I'm thinking of swapping out double figures with something of equal points, or theme. So for Skorne, change out a Cyclops Savage for a Basilisk Drake or Krea. Or even for a Cyclops Brute. Or swap out a Trollblood Impaler for a Bouncer. An argus for a Gorax. And one or two Shredders for Stingers or Harriers.

Things like that. /Ramble

Sunday day was a really good day though, and While Liams Brother and mates didn't turn up I still had a good couple of games against Liam. The game came out 2-1 in his favour. The first game was a ferocious assassination of Karchev, with Lord Carver walking around a corner with his feat active and plenty of fury. Karchev was left on 2 damage points (his movement) until a Farrow Brigand came up and tried his luck. He rolled JUST enough to destroy Karchev.

Second game was Epic Irusk versus the same Carver list. I'd all but massacred most of his unit of Brigands, and the Behemoth tore apart one Warhog in melee (WOO!), while he was slowly whittling away at my unit of Winterguard. Then he put Carver a little too far forward, due to his determination of eliminating my Winterguard, and made an easy access for my Great Bears of Gallowswood to charge him. Well, one. The other two were engaged with a Warhog (whom they promptly left very sorry).

Sadly, that didn't kill Carver. Irusk charged with 6 Focus. Not enough to kill him. Kovnik Joe charged him. Knocked him on his arse because he passed a tough roll. 3 Winterguard Figures shot into his face. Two passed Tough rolls and the Standard Bearer had to finish it off. So Win to me.

Last game we swapped factions. I used his pigs, and he used my Khador. Made up his own list, I'd help him with points, and game on. He used the old Witch and out came her Feat turn. I couldn't charge, I couldn't run, and any time I ended my movement within 14 inches of her, I stuffered a severe damage roll.

Carver, with the addition of his speed enhancing spell, walked up and attempted to kill her. She was left on about 7 health of 17 after some abysmal rolls. Then I realised I forgot to use my feat, which grants me extra damage dice. So out of curiosity, I rolled 2 dice to represent the missing damage dice from the two successful hits. The great Opposers, 6 and 1, rolled up. Exactly what I needed to destroy the Old Witch of Khador.

Then on his turn, the Old Witch did what was expected: She moved in with her twin claws, and smacked the living shit out of Carver. And when my first tough roll came up, I failed. Win: Liam.

But all though the game we talked about the next Hordes Expansion: Domination. To which comes the entire point of the post name:

Yeah, the Legion are looking a little Cthulian. But that's cool.