If Xzibit got a hold of my nightstand

I said I want to dock with my dock
so I can conga dock while I dock.  Clear?

My bedside table is a nightmare.  There is so much shit stuffed into three square feet and it's killing me ever so slightly.  It's all my necessities, the things needed for the high rollin' life I lead.

Glasses and phones, drink and then food;

Playstation and Xbones, and a Switch on a stool;

A drawer that's a bin, and a nosey canine to boot;

These are the things that some would call loot.

You're welcome for my bout of poetry.  The point though is that it's a heap of shit that takes up a bunch of real estate, and that's before you account for USB cords leading up and over everything.

The plan was to resolve this.  To find a way to get all the staple items arranged in a way that I may finally have my nightstand back, somewhere to throw my plates when I have finished dinner and am waiting for the episode of Richard Osman's House of Games to finish.

There's a lot of reasons to want a stand for my glasses and phone.  My glasses can be kept up and out of the way, avoiding spills and potential flattening or snapping.  The Solution?  Easter Island Noses.  Not only a good high place for your looking goggles, but also a snazzy way to look cool while you aren't wearing them.

My phone is longer term matter.

Having a direct USB connection bothers me.  Dozens of items in the past have been ruined from seating a charging device awkwardly and bending the connections.  Luckily we live in the future and through the SCIENTS of MAGIC you can get a Wireless Charging Device.  You place your phone down and centered on it's platform and Voila, your phone starts recharging.  Truly it's the gift that keeps on giving, since my phone hasn't met the floor for any other reason except my clumsiness.

Then there's my Game Stuff.

It's a comfy life being a gamer.  You seat up in bed or on your couch and reach over to the controller, hold down a button, hear a little chime, and sometimes your TV will turn on by itself because you have it set so.  Then play away to your hearts content.

Through all that you caress the controller.  Depressing buttons, stroking the triggers, fondling the sticks, caressing the device's form in the palms of your hands.

They live by your bidding.  Playstation has a built in battery, while Xbox needs AA Batteries due to a very long contract.  You get that rechargable battery though, because if nothing else you can charge it by cord.

The NYKO Solo Charging Blocks
AKA: The Conga Docks

Charging Docks are the future though.  With a little dongle, or a clever design, these devices can be placed on their own pedestals to await their next adventure, fully energised for you to pick up and play.

While these pedestals are a great investment, therein lies part of the problem.  Two competitive consoles, two worlds typically not welcome together.  While I personally went with two separate docks in the end there is a lot of regret in not picking up the NYKO Charging Blocks, also known by my own phrasing as the Conga Dock.  A wonderful union of design and consideration.

If only there was one for the Switch Lite.

This gadget is my favourite piece of kit.  With one reach and a button press, I can be playing Xcom 2 while the UFO series plays in the background.  Or Into The Breach while Voltron kicks ass.  Or Axiom Verge while listening to what makes Metroid so good.  Or Golf Story while... well I don't have a Golf Companion, but you get the point.

It's not without some age old problems found with the PSP back in the day [Link].  Pinky fingers are not a strong enough support to hold such a light device, and craning ones neck down farther so it may rest on ones abdomen only makes things worse.

The comfort grip was automatically the way to go.  I've used controllers for years and the ergonomics of them all is all so easy to fall into.  Having a grip on my Switch that tucks into the palms of my hands is incredibly satisfying after having all those pinky cramps creeping up towards the elbow.

The stand was a different matter.  At the moment the Switch rests on a tablet display stand, keeping it up and rested with a cheap charging dock that changes the angle needed for the charging cable, lifting it up and over and out of the way.  Personally, having something that plugs in and out is a wear and tear demanding losing the device sooner than later.

Thats the appeal in the controller docks.  They both have an electronic touch pad that, when rested on, charge the device without the worry of ruining their USB point.  The PS4 controller has a dongle they provide that hooks into the USB to provide that point, while the Xbox Controllers get a third party rechargable battery with a windowed casing solving two birds with one flung battery.

It's a feature I noticed on my PSP that was never utilised, and frankly should have been.  Given the knowledge and skill with electronics and a 3d Printer, a matching comfort grip and charging dock would be magnificent even as a simple display piece.  Same goes with my GBA SP, another device left to rot with a game of Pokemon Gold in it, the poor bugger.

My Year(s) in Video Games

Well lets deal with the obvious.  I haven't posted here in what feels like an age.  Last post I made was about how I was excited about the Notorious High Tier Assassin Sorscha was being made into a new Warcaster matching my Favourite Theme of Steam Powered Heavy Armour Soldiers.

Sadly I've kinda fallen out of love with Warmachine through my lack of play and interest, feeling very "back in my day, we had fun with our game" about it since I really began lurking and watching from the sidelines, and wishing I could play the Iron Kingdoms RPG instead, mostly because I got a Humble Bundle Deal that got me about 99% of the RPG books for a song.

From that I made a bunch of cool characters, all with little back stories and parties they've formed together, loose motives for their future so that any DM's have something to fuel their own narrative.  Yes I realise that means I should DM my own campaign, but I have every excuse in the book that puts me off of that.

I actually thought about doing a Play By Mail campaign with people, but I just get myself overwhelmed by trying to find some definitive answers from the internet.  I've gotten very Anti-internet for a while and now my Facebook feed is pretty much just a continuing roll of memes and tags.

So I fill in my own time with Video Games, and the last few years have been pretty hit and miss for video games.

Like Xcom 2: War of the Chosen, a fantastic expansion to the game.  It added a bunch of new stuff, like new classes and enemies, new gameplay options, new maps, even a whole new enemy type which is more hassle than they're really worth, but hey you can't get everything right.  Especially when it comes to getting a port fully working.

For ages though I've had a want to make an Xcom Campaign, something more focused on an individual party and having a bunch of encounters based on the different mission types you'd normally encounter in the Grand Strategy games, just more in depth with characters and strategy.

The more I think of it though, the cooler I think it would be as a proper video game taking inspirations from a bunch of games, starting with Xcom: Apocalypse which is focused around a singular Megacity, to Nier Automata, which seems like a far stretch but bear with me, the inspiration comes from the gameplay mechanics which changes style as you go.

For example, one minute you could be fighting in a 3D open arena with enemies coming from all around, to a classic 2D platformer style as you progress through to other map regions.  So from that, I would like to take inspiration from other turn based games and implement them into minor missions or encounters.

The more I think about it though the more I realise I kinda would use features of Mutant Year Zero, a game I really enjoyed, as short lived as it was.  If I were to nitpick it, the tedium of silent takeouts was a little grating, but still it was fun.  It could have been a little more than what it was.

When two world collide
and really support each other

Speaking of games that were more than what was expected: DOOM.  Jesus Christ that was a good game.  The speed, the fun, the exhilaration, the ripping and tearing.  The sequel is coming out in a months time and I'm excited for it even though it looks extremely arcade like in its play.  Lots of double jumping, swing bars, and wall climbing.  I saw a Youtube Card of someones review with the words "Best Mario Game Not Made By Nintendo", which feels conflicting, but hey I'm still keen.

Speaking of Nintendo, Jenny got me a Switch Lite.  It's more or less like a Playstation Portable but bigger and lighter.  I still want to get a grip case for it, maybe something that extends its battery life as well, but that has to wait until I get back to work again before I make any more.

In the meantime I have a handful of games that came with the Xmas present.  Jenny had asked around and got me The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, Civilization VI, Sonic Team Racing, Mario and Sonic Olympics, and Nickelodeon Kart Racing.  The two biggest ones I wanted to play though were Breath of the Wild and Civ6.

Civilization is a game I haven't really played much in my life until this point.  I had Civ 2 or 3 when I was in high school, my mum got it as a group package with Sim City 2000 and The Settlers 2: Veni, Vidi, Vici.  I faffed around with it a lot, but never really sat down with it to understand the rules.  I gave Civ a fair crack of the whip, but on top of the rather awkward UI on the small screen I still don't really know what it is I'm accomplishing.  I do need to spend more time with it though.

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is a very different kettle of fish.  I'm far from finished on it, having only accomplished one of the four mechanical beasts that help in the fight of Calamity Ganon and largely only explored the bottom half of the map between getting my arse served by a new high level monster that I happen to snag the attention of.  It's a good game, don't get me wrong, but I think once I get that grip case I will have a better time fighting thanks to more flexibility in my hands.

While we are on the subject of Nintendo I've been watching a series called Game Makers Toolkit.  My mate Andy pointed me in Mark Browns direction while we were talking about certain games and their mechanics.  Mr Brown had covered the subject quite well and since then I have the occasional playthrough of all his available Youtube videos (Sorry Mark, I can't spare the dosh for your Patreon) while I play a game or sleep.  He's very soothing.

But the ones that really stood out were the series on Metroid.  I have never played a Metroid game in my life.  I think there was a period where I was using a Gameboy emulator and I may have tried to start off one of the Metroid games available but never stuck with it.  His retrospective series gave me a really good insight into the games and piqued my interest into Hollow Knight.

Hollow Knight is about a small Bug Soldier exploring an ancient kingdom called Hollownest.  You explore this hive of networked environments, meeting insects and grubs, defeating rabid bosses, and discovering secrets and history of this fascinating and magical world.  I'm 77% of the way through according to the little meter in the corner of my inventory screen so I have plenty more to find and achieve.

My favourite part of the Remaster

The style of the game has me fascinated though.  The closest I can say that I've played to this is Wonder Boy: The Dragons Trap, which has a beautiful Remaster that threw me back to my Master System days so easily that when I turned on the Retro Visuals I almost thought it was a gag.  That was the closest I came to a Metroidvania game though, and I kinda want to get into more of that style of game now that I've dabbled into it.

Speaking of Re-something games, there was Sonic Mania.  Everyone and their Mother knows that I love Sonic the Hedgehog.  He's my favourite.  I want to get a Tattoo of the Sonic and Knuckles logo on my shoulder because Sonic 3 and Knuckles is my favourite game of all time.  I wouldn't be able to tell you how many hours I've sunk into it, but I know I've deleted and restarted all of those save slots until they were all 100% several times over.

Sonic Mania was really fun though.  I wasn't a big fan of some of the newer Zones, some of them stuck out as being out of place, but its still a really fun game.  I haven't been able to sit myself down to max out everything yet but I want to get a Genesis Controller for my Playstation just so I can really get back into how I used to play, which weirdly had my right hand turned over so I'm using my digits instead of my thumb to jump.

My other favourite game that came out was Borderlands 3.  A good game overall, but sadly their antagonists weren't particularly encapsulating, especially when they were following one of the best arseholes to kill off at the end of his story, Handsome Jack.

I keep seeing people on Reddit going "Bring back Handsome Jack!" which is depressing because that's really just beating a dead horse.  I love Handsome Jack, he's a great bastard to hate, and there are a few references to him, particularly in one side mission that really brings to light how malicious he can be, but he's done.  He has died in all but a Gun that plays voice clips of him.

The new Antagonists are nowhere near as hard hitting.  I said in an old post, that I'm going to redo an elaborate on one day, that there was a turning point.  That you have him playing in your ear and you don't really take him seriously until you reach a real turning point, and suddenly you have it in your heart that you need to take him down.  You need to go after him and really kill him off.

You can't go wrong with a Robot Beast Tamer

That doesn't really happen in 3.  It could be because they stumbled upon playing the same card as they did with Handsome Jack in 2, or because they just aren't that impressive, there just isn't that turning point in the story where you're motivated to stop them.

Thankfully they still have DLC coming out.  The first was a fun tribute to Handsome Jack's Stunt Double and Moxxi where you raid a Casino.  Good value.  The next one is going to be really fun as well, but I have no idea what that'll be.

Another game that really changed things up is Gears of War 5.  Or Gears 5, as they are want to go with now.  Largely, the game is still the same.  Cover based shooting and encroaching against Mutants that emerge from the ground, occasionally with a Gigantic Monster to accompany them.  But what I liked about it was the change from just straight mission after mission to a semi-open world setting, travelling on a Kite Sled between notable locations and regions that lead into missions.  Something a bit more freeform in play.

Which can be bad, such as the case of Wolfenstein Youngblood.  That was not a good game.  A lot of ideas going for it, but just so poorly executed.  A lot of cool stuff for it, the levels are pretty, the combat is fun, the super powers are always a fun addition, but... god everything else was as shallow as a Kiddy Pool.

John Carmack, one of the big Doom Guys, said "Story in a game is like a story in a porn movie. It's expected to be there, but it's not that important."  Well that's all well and good, but if you really treat it like that you get this game, where you have so little direction for your players to go that you flounder what you want them to do and encounter.

So that's what I mean by hit and miss.  There's been really good games and there have been really bad games.  I'm keen on what 2020 has to offer for games, but there's still the matter of all the games i"m yet to play.  Like Prey, Outer Worlds, and Dishonoured: Death of the Outsider.  And I haven't even finished talking about all the games I've played, really, but hey, I gotta stop this at some point.

Insert Token Self Deprecating Meme

Not going to get excited

Touching, isn't it? *Ducks*

I feel pessimistic and sad when I see articles getting ecstatic about Nintendo Patenting Gameboy emulation software because there could be a sad demise lurking in the future for all those hopeful hearts.

Nintendo filed it a while ago and were recently approved for the patenting. And with having such an enormous and successful backlog of Gameboy games, it's a very lucrative investment turning them into purchasable downloads.

For years though, people have gotten away with the various third party emulators, downloadable from the internet, freely attainable on any android or windows device, Roms collected like candy from a piñata.

That's going to change though. Nintendo can now send a cease and desist to whomever freely gives out an emulator. I'm actually surprised they didn't jump on the Rom distributors earlier, actually. But if there aren't any emulators, then what's the point in having the Roms, right?

But this patent, it's getting everyone so excited because they think Nintendo will play along and make their own Emulation App, which I admit would be nice. They could probably get the tablet controls nice and clean, some game pad functionality, Apple TV connectivity. Heck, I would be head over heels if they had the app available for Playstation TV so I could play both Tactics Ogre Games on the same device.

Then again they could, and probably should, just have the entire Gameboy library on for the Wii and DS on their eStore. Cheap too, I wouldn't expect any game to be over $5.

Getting it right

So, now that the Xbox One has been revealed (No, not the mother ship) it's time for me to compare between this generation of leading consoles.

So what am I expecting? 

Frankly, just an improvement on the same guff, with a new skin and a few new gadgets and features to keep up to date. Call me what you will, but I don't like too much change.

Touch screens have become an every day thing. And I like that. You can get a touch screen on just about anything, from your phone, to your car, to your keyboard. So I expect some reasonable touch screen implements on the controller. Makes sense to me.

Then there's The Digital Distribution (Pretty sure someone I know hates when people say that). Yes, it's moving into that time of history when you may never have to leave your home for games again, and shelves of game cases and boxes and manuals are coming to an end. And I'll accept that. Though I hope that they come through for the customer and make games cheaper because of it.

And a lastly, Backwards Compatibility. The first person I think of is Scott, a boy who has had his Xbox 360 for a Bajillion years (may or may not be exaggerated), has amassed a Library of games that could potentially be covered by insurance, and not to mention a considerable investment into his Xbox Live Account. So, like myself back in the previous generation where PS3 couldn't play PS2 games, I would hope they don't go to waste on him. Or myself, for that matter. I have these too, you know.

These are my basic expectations. That is all I want. That's all I ever need. Whether its a simple evolution, or to satiate my Hoarding Instincts, these are my standard requests for these consoles.

So what am I getting? Let's begin with the controller. 

Wii U was first in the ring, eager to prove its mettle and show that it's a system that constantly evolving, a reputation that its stuck to for over a decade of consoles now, whether its having ergonomically designed controllers which threaten to cramp your fingers, or making you get off your bedsores and doing jumping jacks in front of your Tv, they continue to do something different.

This time with a large touch screen the size of a tablet, and all the buttons you need to play whatever game you're heart desires. It can be used as a Gm screen for certain games, or it can be used to just keep playing your games on your lonesome by streaming it to the tablet instead of the telly. Like having a handheld console. Or a tablet with buttons and sticks.

Score 1 for Nintendo.

Playstation were up next, ready to show off the muscle power they had for their new Controller and... It was a bit disappointing. They had the touch screen. But, as I was hoping it wouldn't be, it was the same shape controller but the centre bridge was given some touchy bits, and Bob's your Mums Brother, they were done.

Oh, sorry, they added a couple other buttons. Not game play buttons, but an Options Button (I assume is the new PSButton) and a Share button, a feature of your online Profile, which I'll get into later.

So half point, Playstation. I would give you less, but you came through with something.

Xbox, the last into the ring, the big contender, the console with the most-ole... Changed very little.  It looks nice. Sleek and curvy like a sexy lady. But... It looks a bit like a third party piece at the moment. That's probably just me, of course.

It does have a unique Rumble setup. Rather than just shaking madly in the palm of your hands, it actually has a regional thing. Like if you fire a rifle, you feel it in the trigger you use, rather than the entire thing. That's cute, I'll grant.

But where is the touch screen? It should come standard! What?

Zero points, Xbox. No, you can't cheat by making me say your name, Durango.

Okay, so what about this Online Distribution business?

This I cannot really answer. The price for online games will be something we look at long off in the future once they're released. I'm not optimistic at first, since I imagine Game discs won't go extinct any time soon, and each company have made it pretty clear they aren't fully integrating into Pure Online Distribution.

So what else is there to being Online with your console?

Well It's not just a distributor now, it's a Social Network. Like Facebook. Only for games. Originally, it was simple. You pick a name and profile pic, put in a couple of details if you want, and you look up your friends. When you're signed in, you know when your friends are online, how long they've been offline, and what games and notable event tokens they've got (aka Achivements, Trophies, etc).

Playstation and Xbox are working with that. That share button i mentioned before? Well you can upload your events to your profile. Whether you're running through an entire level, or just showing off how stylishly you picked up an achievement. That's fun.

Nintendo... I don't think they're doing anything like that. It's a games console, and it focuses on that. They have an online store and that's pretty much it. You can connect with friends online and stuff, but that's about it. Nothing really Social Network about it.

I can't really give any points, because they're not on my list of Expectations. But if I could, I would give it to Xbox and Playstation for putting in an effort.

However, I would take it away from Xbox again because of their new setup for games. There are no Used Games any more. If you buy an Xbox One game, you register it to your account, you install the game, and that's it. If your friends borrow the disc, they get a prompt asking them to purchase it. That is, if the game doesn't allow you to play a demo of it before asking. That'd be a nice way to handle it.

Xbox did say that there will be a trading option though. Your game is traded for another across accounts. Reasonable. Not too shabby an idea, but what's to stop Xbox from making you pay $5 to make the trade? I have borrowed a few games from Scott over the years. I would probably owe him close to $50 by now, based on that. We'll have to wait and see with that though.

Alright, last thing: Backwards Compatibility. What's the go with that?

In Case you didn't know, Backwards Compatibility is important to me. I've been burnt once before, with the Playstation 3. I'm still hurt. My Playstation 2 is still here, and I have the games hidden away in a box... But I don't want them there. My Playstation 2 should be gone, recycled to make something else. And my games should be out with all the others.

But they're not. They're in a box. With a collection of DVDs that I don't want getting lost with Mums. And my current games would have to join them if I decide to pick up either the PS4 or the Xbox One.

A couple of years ago, about four now I think, when I succumbed and actually got my PS3, one of the higher ups from Playstation said "There's no profit in backwards compatibility". Yep. Fair point. Mind you, there are still hundreds of games for the Playstation 2 that were still being purchased because of the PS2 they continued to distribute until the beginning of 2013.

Since then you can get a select collection of Playstation One and HD remastered Playstation 2 games. Games I already own, funny enough. Games I don't want to fork out more money for just so I can play them. But a half point to them for trying. Most of the HD remasters that I've played though haven't exactly been... Pleasant.

Apparently there is also the mention of Streaming PS3 games. You buy it again, of course, but rather than having to download it and install it, you just play it from a remote server across the globe. Too bad if you don't have a good bandwidth, hey.

Xbox have made a similar statement. "If you're backwards compatible, you're really backwards." Now that hurt. That's a right run up and kick in the fucking goolies. And I love my goolies. They're good to me. They had reason not to do it, coming down to operating system and such technical jargon, so there wasn't any need for a comment that you know would spark up reactions that would include two words. "Fuck" and "Off".

The other thing is the Online Profile aspect. There are plenty of games on there. And it's all going to be chucked down the drain. All those investments, all those purchases, all those games. Gone. You can't play them if you've replaced your console. Which is the point of buying the new console, you replace it because its a system that does the same thing as its predecessor, but better.

WiiU have at least had the decency to just say "No, it won't be supporting GameCube games." Nintendo: Gamings Evolutionary Experimenter. Gets a point for still supporting its predecessors games. Fully supporting them too. Just because there's a new controller doesn't mean that you can't hook up a WiiMote and threaten to shatter your tv screen. So a half point for being sportsmanlike when you've taken something away.

So where does that leave the three in standing?

WiiU: 1.5 points.

Playstation 2: 1.5 points.

Xbox One: 0 points.

So in the NHCC has declared that the Xbox is the biggest disappointment of this generation, whereas its competitors are considerably more preferable for long time faithful players. I'm appalled, but facing the future and dealing with the fact that companies don't actually have any consideration for faithful customers. If that changes in the future, I would be pleasantly surprised.