I learnt a new word, Jenny

A week and a half. A week and a fucking half. FUCK a week and a half. Not even a week and a half, I get to see her in... well actually yeah, a week and a half. Midday Saturday, East Aus time, I'll be-wait no, it'll probably be closer to 1pm. I think that's right. Whatever, it's in around that area. And I'll be turning up to Jennys place, stinky as heck because of constant flying, no shower (Unless you count wet wipes) and being stuck between what will total to about 6 people in 3 different cattle class flights doesn't help the case, and boy will I adore that shower when I get there, fresh, scalding water and then crawling into bed next to Jenny and probably passing out like a switch because it's been so many hours since I would've had a decent hours sleep, which can be absolutely horrific on the system because frankly I get rather dumb and unenthused of a morning because I am by far NOT a morning person, I repeat NOT a morning person, unless I get an excessive amount of sleep, and I'm going to need it after double digits of flights into LA plus flights to Minneapolis then into K-zoo itself, and I know that terrorists won't take my flights because there's really no point, I don't quite see someone taking over my flight just to ram it into Shakespeares Pub, because it's a nice pub and I had my first quesadilla there and they should enjoy it too because I have a wonderful story about quesadilla that actually caused me to swear in front of Jennys Grandmother, who was quite surprised at my potty mouth but she knew that I wasn't swearing at her because she heard the whole of my wonderful story about Jenny going to an Australian Themed Pub which offered Quesadilla which I hadn't heard of before that day, but it turns out it's just some stuff with cheese in the middle of a soft tortilla shell and then put into a sandwich press or something like that, I'm not actually sure how they make it but thats me making up recipes again because I'm not sure and hazarding a guess can be pretty fun, unless you're a kid making a coffee and translate being told that because there's no teaspoons you should use a tablespoon and forget to adjust for how much coffee can be taken in a tablespoon so when you gave the coffee to your parents guest they received a rather chunky drink with 5 coffee's in it and 2 sugar in one of your dads ridicuous enamel cups that are massive but have the tiniest handle that you can only put two fingers through and have to put as much pressure from your thumb onto the handle so that it doesn't tip over and spill or burn you fucking fingers since it kept heat in the cup like electricity through water, which makes me think of the game I've been playing recently, Deus Ex, which is set in a futuristic Detroit and it subtly talks about the debate between being human and being part robotic, and then the point where the robotic parts are acquired like Noserings and tattoos, but rather than go down to the corner where your mate does it for cheap, you actually go in for it and get yourself "Enhanced", and then people just argue on and on about how "oh you were beautiful before you did that" and "You got some totes sick accessories there, bro" but if it were really Detroit it would probably be a bit more menacing if they were pretending to be proper Detroitians which I've never met because the only time I've been in Detroit is when I last went to see Jenny which I didn't have to roll into bed to snooze away, though I did, and my time in Detroit was actually really quick because the airport is set on the outskirts of town and we just went in and went out and I unpacked and we chatted and stuff and I can't wait to do that again which is in A FUCKING WEEK AND A HALF HOLY CRAP A WEEK AND A HALF and I've pretty much got all the little things I want to take over there ready and put away in a corner, such as books I've been meaning to give her, and the DVD's of Outrageous Fortune which I know she would really like even though she may not understand the slang or maybe even the accent because it's really quite thick and I think there was one or two cases where I rewinded the DVD to have them repeat it, but overall it's good and Jenny is going to love it along with the Plushie Blastoise that Aaron got me, and Jenny and I are going to use him to make funny pictures like the size perspective ones and get some sort of monument and put Blastard (which is what I'm naming him) up next to it and say "This is Blastard and he is not happy with your customer service, Walmart" and if I had talent I'd get the photo of a pair of hoses going off and then photoshop the water coming out to be from the guns in Blastard's shell, and some person of Walmart will look like they're about to get drenched which could go one of two ways because you may drench a chick who would look good for a wet t-shirt competition, or you could drown a dude that looks like a chick in a tiny dress and I'm going to stop there because that may just put me off the pie that I'm having for breakfast cos I eat the breakfast of champions with a 5 tablespoon coffee and a meat pie, but actually instead of a coffee, because that tastes terrible, I have a small can of mother which I shouldn't be having because I was off the energy drinks for quite a while, and I'd place a fiver to say that right now you're thinking "So that explains the writing style" to which you're WRONG! WRONG SO EVERLOVINGLY WRONG ABOUT THE THEME OF THIS POST because I'd actually read "Rik Mayall: Bigger than Hitler, Better than Christ" recently and finished it and it was a pretty fun book but it kinda dragged along in the middle until he had his meeting with God after smacking his head in that Quad-bike accident (The Nonce - who goes biking in the fucking rain?) and there was a chapter in there where he just went on and on and on and on and on and on and just didn't stop until he felt satisfied that he had completed what he was talking about, but I'm not going to be like that when I go see Jenny because I'm not the best conversationalist but I'll be getting her laughing where I can and making her happy because that's what I aim to do, especially on a day like today which is our 21st Mensiversary which doesn't mean anything about being manly, but that's apparently the proper word for celebrating something monthly on the same date, like our mensiversary which happens on the 14th of every month which is something I accounted when I planned my flights to go see Jenny because while I'm going to be there for her Birthday on the 3rd of October, I'm also going to be there for our 22nd Mensiversary and I'm thinking of taking her out to dinner or something nice like that, I haven't thought that far ahead and I'll discuss it with Jenny because I'll still be in K-zoo, a land of wonder and excitement and I'm not sure where to go or what to do so this will be a very fun holiday for the 3-4 weeks that I'm there and I just can't wait for ANOTHER WEEK AND A FUCKING HALF! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Happy Mensiversary, Jenny